Glittering
by fateofawakening
Summary: Nanase Haruka has always loved the water, but somebody had to literally push him in before he dared to swim in it. Now, years later, the two are reunited - but their lives are not easy. As they help each other resolve the biggest conflicts they've ever encountered, Haruka learns to follow the light - shining, glittering, her voice echoing in his head... "What are you afraid of?"
1. Chapter 1

**Hi, everyone! This is my first Free! fanfic, so I hope you enjoy! I have to warn you that I can be a bit of a dramatic writer (in terms of setting and description and words, not the characters themselves), so it might be a bit much for some people - but I hope it's alright!**

 **Enjoy!**

 **Chapter 1**

She was a bubbly girl with long light blue hair tied into twin pigtails that cascaded down her back as she made her way through the halls, a bright smile on her face as she went. Her eyes, the same shade of pale blue as her hair, seemed to glitter. It was a common saying among those who knew her that her eyes "held the oceans themselves." She wore the Iwatobi High School girls' uniform, and she wore it well, the outfit fitting her small but lean figure perfectly. She was a first-year, and new to the school, of course, but she turned heads everywhere she went. People whispered, "Who's that first-year? She's cute. I wonder if she'd eat lunch with us? What club is she going to join?"

Although she was considered "cute," it was her personality, more than her physical features, that gained her this recognition. She was naturally charismatic and made friends easily, and she seemed to have a shining aura around her that attracted attention.

She was headed for the rooftop because she liked the feel of air and space around her, carrying her bento box wrapped in a light blue wrap, smiling and nodding to anybody who approached her or dared to wave "hello." The number of people in the hallways diminished as she got nearer to the stairs, and she climbed them with all the ease of a natural athlete.

She pushed open the door to the rooftop and blinked as the sunlight hit her and temporarily blinded her. Once she could see more clearly, she stepped out onto the roof, where there were two or three groups eating together.

"Ah, Ikeda-san!"

Hikaru turned to see a familiar-looking red-haired girl waving to her from where she was sat with one of her friends. "Hello," said Hikaru, smiling and waving. "You're in my class, aren't you?"

"Yes, I'm Matsuoka Kou – but 'Kou' is fine. Would you like to sit with us for lunch?"

"Sure," said Hikaru easily, walking toward them. Her friend was a brunette with green eyes, who smiled back as their eyes met. "I'm Ikeda Hikaru. You're in my class as well, right? It's nice to meet you both!"

"Nice to meet you too, Ikeda-san," said the brunette. "I'm Hanamura Chigusa."

"Oh, please call me 'Hikaru'," said Hikaru, unable to stop herself. She laughed as she sat down and added, "'Ikeda-san' is just too formal for me. Nope – I just don't do formal."

"Hikaru-chan, then," Kou decided, and Hikaru nodded her approval as she unwrapped her bento box. Inside, her father had packed her three _onigiri_ and a light salad on the side.

Hikaru was about to ask the two girls about themselves when she overheard a group of boys talking, not too far away from them. "Hey, that swimming club we used to go to is finally being torn down."

"We should go visit."

"Not interested."

"Oh, come on!"

Kou's attention had been captured too, her maroon-ish eyes flitting to them immediately. Swimming, huh? Hikaru took a bite out of an _onigiri_.

"Come _on_ , Haru-chan!"

Curious about swimmers as always, Hikaru glanced over to see a small blonde boy shaking and clinging onto a taller, black-haired boy with blue eyes. He had on a stoic expression, just standing there and letting the blonde shake him about, but his eyes had caught Hikaru's.

She had caught his attention when she'd first stepped out onto the roof, with her long blue hair and the graceful way she walked, but her eyes were startlingly familiar. They reminded him of water, deep and clear and peaceful, but also dangerous. She was a first-year, judging by her uniform. _She_ had been a year younger than him, he remembered – could it be?

No, he thought. It wasn't possible. _She_ had gone away so long ago, and he'd never seen her again. What would she be doing here, at Iwatobi High School?

She smiled as the girl next to her said something, and Haruka just felt a strong sense of deja-vu wash over him. Her aura blanketed her like a cloud, shimmering and demanding his attention.

It was just a coincidence.

Definitely a coincidence.

"Ne, are you listening, Haru-chan? We've gotta go! For old times' sake!"

Distracted, Haruka agreed before he really thought about what Nagisa was asking. Makoto, noticing his change in behavior, turned his head and followed his gaze. He'd only seen Haru's "guardian angel" once before, many years ago, but there was no mistaking that shade of blue – not to mention the very aura she gave off.

But, he thought to himself, smiling wryly, Haru would surely convince himself that it was all just a coincidence.

He couldn't do anything about that.

The next time they met was a few weeks later, at the school's old, run-down pool. The boys had been cleaning it out, and they'd come back the next afternoon to find a girl, dressed in her P.E. uniform, spraying disinfectant and bleach everywhere.

"Eh? Who're you?" Nagisa blurted out, and she gave a particularly difficult spot one final spray before turning around and beaming at them.

"Well, I heard you were starting a swim club, and that you needed to clean out the pool, so I thought I'd give you a hand," she said cheerfully, raising one hand – and bottle – into the air. "You don't want to swim in dirtied water, right? Ew."

Their eyes were wide with disbelief. Makoto was the first to recover, and smiled at her. "That's really nice of you," he said, hoping Haru would somehow connect the dots. They were by a pool, after all. Well, sort of. "You're a first-year, right? I've seen you before."

"Ah, yes, I'm sorry!" She bowed to them. "I'm Ikeda Hikaru. Nice to meet you."

"I'm Tachibana Makoto, a second-year. This is Hazuki Nagisa, a first-year, and Nanase Haruka, a second-year. We really appreciate your help."

"Yeah, thanks!" Nagisa beamed at her. "Hey, I'll help!"

He jumped into the empty pool and ran to join her, grabbing one of the spray bottles and spritzing it at a dark spot. Hikaru scrubbed at the spots she'd sprayed, and was satisfied to see the dark spot turn whiter.

"I'll scrub, you guys spray," said Makoto, coming up behind them, grabbing the brush. After a moment, Haruka joined them, a second brush in hand. Work progressed a lot faster after that, most of the conversation led by Hikaru and Nagisa, Haruka barely speaking a word.

"Hikaru-san, what made you take interest in the swim club?" asked Makoto. Hikaru grinned and sprayed another spot, as Makoto followed her with his brush.

"Well, I'm a swimmer," she said. "I swam a lot when I was in America, and so when I moved back here, of course I had to check out the swim club, right? And I overheard you guys talking about the swim club, so here I am! Besides, this is pretty fun, for some reason. I'm not really sure why."

Makoto laughed. "I'm glad you like swimming," he said. "Would you like to officially join the club?"

"Yes, please!" Hikaru was rather relieved that he'd offered. "I'd love to!"

"That's good – hey, we've got a new member!" Makoto shouted to the other two. Nagisa showed his excitement by jumping up and down, while Haruka just sort of nodded and went back to scrubbing. Hikaru laughed at his reaction.

On the other side of the pool, Haruka had a few suspicions. Despite telling himself, over and over, that there was _no way she could be the same girl_ , there was something about her eyes that wanted to convince him that _perhaps she could be the same girl, after all._ He tried to clear his thoughts, but her eyes kept coming back to him.

He remembered the first time they'd met, when he'd been staring down at the flowing creek. He'd been mesmerized by its beauty, and he wanted to touch it, but he was afraid. As a four-year-old, his parents hadn't let him go to the ocean alone, either, although he thought it was rather beautiful as well.

"You're not going to touch it?"

He turned to see a girl about his age, staring at him with big blue eyes the color of water. "No," he said, not wanting to say that he was afraid.

"Why not? It's pretty, isn't it?"

"Mhmm."

"Then why not?"

He hesitated. "I'm scared."

"I'll protect you!" She beamed at him. "I'll be your guardian angel! I'm only three, but I can swim! Kinda!"

The creek was shallow enough. If they really tried, they could probably reach the bottom. Haruka was conflicted. To touch or not to touch?

 _"What are you afraid of?"_

He gasped as he felt himself falling and he hit the cold water abruptly, the shock traveling through his body. He didn't know how to swim, and found himself staring at the surface of the water. It was peaceful down here, he thought, forgetting for a moment that he would need to breathe. The surface of the water, getting further and further away from him, was shining, glittering, a beautiful blue, not unlike the eyes of the girl who'd pushed him in –

Two hands wrapped around his torso, pulling him upward, though not without some trouble. They broke the surface, gasping for air. The girl turned to him and smiled. "See? Wasn't that fun?"

It was, indeed, and after that, Haruka found himself falling in love with the water, and with the sight that girl had first shown him.

But she had left after a few days of meeting him by the creek, saying she had to move to some faraway country, and he had never seen her again. He'd been kind of distraught – this he would admit with some reluctance – and sometimes he'd go back to the creek, but she was never there.

He shook his head to clear his thoughts. He hadn't changed that much throughout the years, either – surely, if Ikeda really _was_ the same girl, then she would've recognized him already. Then again, he thought, although she'd made a lasting impact on his life, perhaps he had just been a passing memory, already forgotten, unimportant. Somehow, the thought made him a bit sad.

"Haru-chan!" Nagisa was shaking him, hard, and he flew back to reality, eyes widening. "Haru-chan, I've been calling you for ages! Did you disappear or something?"

"I was thinking," said Haruka simply, not bothering to unattach himself from the hyperactive blonde, who just sort of stared at him with big eyes.

"Well, I was asking if you wanted to go get ice cream later," said Nagisa, still holding on tight. "Please, please, please? Mako-chan, you have to come too!"

"Sure thing," Makoto replied from the other side of the pool, where he and Ikeda – he felt weird addressing or thinking of her as simply "Hikaru," since they'd just met – were apparently making good progress. "Hikaru-san, you should come along as well."

"Yeah!" Nagisa shouted, seeing her initial reluctance. "It'll be fun!"

"I don't want to intrude on you guys," said Ikeda, laughing sheepishly.

"You won't be intruding," said Makoto firmly. "You're part of the club now, after all. Well, you will be, as soon as you turn in your club request form."

Her entire expression changed into a sad frown. "That's so much work," she grumbled, as Nagisa danced over to her, spray bottle still in hand.

"I'll do it for you!" he volunteered, clearly excited about having a new club member. "Ne, ne, you have to do it, Hikaru-chan, or you can't join!"

Ikeda clapped her hands over her eyes as though in despair. "I wanna join!"

"Then fill out a form!" shouted Nagisa, without missing a beat.

"I'll do it!" yelled Ikeda, and the two of them high-fived each other, big goofy smiles on their faces. Haruka shook his head. They were crazy. Although he thought Ikeda was interesting for several reasons, he wasn't sure if he was looking forward to having another Nagisa in the club.

Makoto was smiling at him, for whatever reason. He just stared back. When Makoto said nothing but just continued to smile, Haruka went back to his work and continued scrubbing. Whatever, he thought. He was secretly rather fond of Nagisa, so maybe he'd be okay with Ikeda, too.

After scrubbing the entire pool down, which took them several hours, the four of them changed back into their school uniforms and tossed their sweaty jerseys into their backpacks to take home and wash. They headed down the street, Ikeda and Nagisa leading the way, singing some sort of dumb children's song as they went. Makoto was watching them in amusement. Haruka felt like smiling would be giving up and conceding to their weirdness.

He wondered if Ikeda could really swim, and if so, how well she could do it. He was staring at her back pondering this issue when Makoto voiced his thoughts. "You're wondering whether or not she swims, aren't you?"

Well, he had always been good at guessing Haruka's thoughts. Makoto laughed upon seeing that he had been correct.

"She told me she swam a lot in America," he said. "Swimming's a pretty big thing there, isn't it?"

Haruka wasn't sure, so he just shrugged.

"Or you could just ask her."

Haruka didn't really want to ask her. She seemed to be having a good time prancing around with Nagisa. And besides, how would he start? That would be a bit weird, he thought. Definitely weird.

Makoto just sighed and turned away. They reached the convenience store on the corner of the block and entered, heading for the frozen aisle. Ikeda and Nagisa had already picked out a bunch of popsicles by the time they'd gotten there – a milk-flavored one for Ikeda and Haruka, and strawberry for Nagisa and Makoto.

They were also having a heated argument about which flavor was better.

Haruka sighed, took the four popsicles out of their dramatically-waving hands, and headed over to the register to pay for them. Almost immediately, Ikeda jumped in front of him, blocking his way. "I'll pay," she said firmly, but he just shrugged and tried to go around her. She moved to block him again. He moved left. She moved left. He moved right. She moved right. He faked a left and went right, but she was already there.

"Ikeda-san, I will pay for them," said Haruka, somehow unwilling to give up the fight. He wasn't really an aggressive person, but Ikeda had done them a favor by joining the club, since they needed more members in order to actually establish the club itself. He could at least repay the favor by buying her a popsicle – they were cheap, anyway.

" _Don't_ call me that," said Ikeda, pouting. "I'm Hikaru. Okay? Hikaru. _Hi-ka-ru_."

Haruka blinked. "Hikaru-san, please move aside."

He was pretty sure Makoto and Nagisa were laughing at him in the background, but chose to ignore them. Ike – er, _Hikaru_ shook her head "no."

"To celebrate you joining the club," said Haruka, hoping this would convince her.

Her frown grew deeper.

"They're cheap anyway," Haruka offered.

She seemed to be considering it.

"You can treat me next time."

She gave up, sighing. "Fineeeee," she conceded, moving to the side and letting Haruka pass. He felt a sort of pride in having won the "argument," as silly as that was. Maybe he was catching Nagisa germs.

He paid for the popsicles and handed them out outside the store. Milk flavor was the best. Hikaru evidently agreed, licking her popsicle happily as she and Nagisa chatted about rockhopper penguins – Iwatobi's mascot animal.

"Hey, guys," said Hikaru, breaking her conversation with Nagisa and catching their attention. Haruka forced himself to stop thinking about the nearby ocean and pay attention. "Since the pool hasn't been fixed yet, what do you say we stop by the gym and swim a few laps?"

Haruka's attention had been caught. Swimming. Pool. Laps. "Where?" he demanded immediately, and Hikaru's eyes glittered.

"My uncle and aunt own a small gym with a pool," she explained. "We could go there now, if you want – "

Haruka had taken her by the shoulders, moving instinctively. His eyes were shining, and Hikaru resisted the urge to laugh at his eagerness.

"I'll take you there, then," she said, beaming. "Come on!"

All three of them followed her through the streets happily. Although they weren't quite as water-crazy as Haruka, it was obvious to Hikaru that they all loved swimming, and hadn't really gotten a chance to do so recently.

She got them into the gym and provided them with extra swimsuits (Haruka had his on underneath his clothes, of course) before changing into one herself and joining them in the pool. As she floated across the pool, staring at the dimly-lit ceiling, she couldn't help but think that her sister would've been _so_ pleased to see how Nanase Haruka had grown.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

She turned in her club application form the next day at the prodding of both Kou – who was the swim team's manager – and Nagisa. As the two of them continued to argue about whether her name was "Gou" or "Kou" – which Hikaru didn't particularly care about – Haruka walked up to them and sort of stood to the side, watching.

"Where's Makoto-kun?" asked Hikaru.

"Turning in an assignment he missed," said Haruka simply. They were up on the roof again, about to eat lunch. Hikaru couldn't help but notice that Haruka didn't _have_ a lunch.

Makoto joined them moments later and they all sat down to eat, Nagisa and Kou still bickering. Hikaru and Makoto exchanged looks, then both looked at Haruka, who seemed unaffected. Finally, Makoto sighed. "Haru, you should eat something."

"I don't have a lunch."

"Well, go buy something."

"Waste of money."

Hikaru's eyes narrowed. She unwrapped her third _onigiri_ and shoved it in his mouth as he opened it to say something. His eyes widened and he almost choked. "Just eat it," said Hikaru, as he got over his surprise and started to glare at her. He bit off the part that had been in his mouth and held the rest of it in one hand, chewing. They glared at each other, both unwilling to give up.

Hikaru was aware of how even Nagisa and Kou had stopped fighting to stare at them, but she didn't let it affect her glare.

"Eat the whole thing, or you don't get to go to the gym again."

Haruka's eyes widened, and the _onigiri_ was gone before anybody could blink. Hikaru smiled triumphantly and went back to stabbing at her salad, as the other three continued to stare in awe at Haruka, who appeared unaffected. He chewed and swallowed, and that was that.

The pool was fixed up by the end of the week, and all that was left was for the pool people to straighten out the water pipes and drains and such. In celebration, though, Kou asked the team to join her for dinner on Saturday. They all readily agreed, although Haruka didn't seem too excited about it. Well, he didn't seem reluctant, either, so that was good.

Hikaru waved good-bye to her father, who said he hoped she'd have a good time, and ran out the door of the house. The restaurant they were meeting at was really close to her house, so she got there quickly and, upon confirming that nobody else had arrived yet, asked for a table to seat six – Haruka, Makoto, Nagisa, Kou, and their faculty adviser, Amakata-sensei, who was apparently Haruka and Makoto's teacher.

She sat down and pulled out her phone.

 **'Reserved a table!'** she sent to all of them, just so that they knew. Moments later, Haruka and Makoto walked in, spotted her, and approached the table. Makoto smiled at her and she smiled back, the three of them exchanging short greetings.

Makoto pushed Haruka forward and they sat down beside her, leaving the other side of the table open. "How are you, Hikaru-san?" asked Makoto, ever the nice one.

Hikaru beamed at him. "I'm great! Hey, do you guys want to go to the gym again after dinner? We can work off all these calories!"

Hikaru and Makoto laughed, but Haruka just gazed at her intensely, blue eyes gleaming. She got the hint and patted him on the shoulder, still giggling.

"You got it then, _Haru-chan_."

He suddenly scowled. "Drop the '-chan'."

"Eh? Nagisa can call you that, but I can't?"

"I've told him many times, but he won't listen."

"Then I won't either!"

She "hmph"-ed, much to Haruka's displeasure and Makoto's amusement. He refused to say another word to her after that, and she and Makoto tried to talk around him, but it felt weird. She didn't like people mad at her. Sneaking a peek at him, she saw that he was still stony-faced, refusing to look at her and instead staring at the opposite wall.

She nudged him. No response. She nudged him again. Still no response.

"Fine," she ground out. "How about just Haruka, then?"

"No."

Before she could reply, a voice interrupted them. "Haru-chan! Mako-chan! Hikaru-chan!" Nagisa was waving at them excitedly, followed by a somewhat-embarrassed Kou, who told him to pipe down as people began to stare. Oblivious, Nagisa ran toward them and greeted them cheerfully. Kou sighed and followed.

The two of them sat down across from Hikaru and Haruka, Nagisa still chattering away about how his dad had bought him a new Playstation. Hikaru tried to listen, but she wasn't really big on gaming, so she didn't know what to say. Instead, she smiled at a passing waiter, who immediately halted in his tracks and came over to them.

"Any drinks for you to get started?" he asked the group.

"I'll take an iced tea," said Hikaru, smiling. "Thanks."

The waiter, a lean man around his early twenties, seemed to turn a bit red. As though at a loss for words, he just nodded. Haruka's eyes narrowed before he caught himself. He didn't need to be wary of anybody _for_ Hikaru – the girl could handle herself. "Just water," he said.

"Iced tea for me too, please," said Makoto from beside him.

"Oh, you have milkshakes here! Can I get a vanilla one?"

"Sure thing," said the waiter, scribbling furiously.

"Another iced tea for me," said Kou. The waiter blushed again upon meeting her gaze. Haruka resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

"And a hot tea for me, please," came Amakata-sensei's voice from behind Kou, as she quickly made for the remaining empty seat across from Makoto.

"Of course," said the waiter. Haruka was pretty sure he was trying to avoid Amakata-sensei's gaze, in case he started blushing again. That waiter was too easily distracted, he thought, and then realized that he was equally as distracted when it came to water. Well, whatever.

"I'm surprised you're all drinking iced drinks in the spring," said Amakata-sensei, to which Hikaru giggled and said,

"I like iced stuff, you know?"

"I used to, as well," said the brunette, a bit forlornly. "Ah, youth."

"Eh? Amakata-sensei, you can't be much older than us," said Hikaru, and at that moment Haruka realized that this girl was really amazing at flattery, whether she was doing it on purpose or not. Amakata-sensei turned pink and couldn't help but smile.

"Thank you, Hikaru-chan! That's sweet of you."

Hikaru looked genuinely confused. "Just stating the truth."

Makoto chuckled and leaned over to whisper in Haruka's ear. "Amazing, isn't she?"

Haruka just grunted and turned his head away, and Makoto continued to laugh at him. Whatever. There wasn't really much to laugh about. Hikaru was a shining, glittering soul who charmed everyone she met. Haruka, in comparison, felt like a deep, dark pit of, well, not emptiness, but _not much_.

He didn't really make friends easily. He didn't really like people. He liked being alone in the water, and he liked Makoto a lot because Makoto was cool about everything. He was the complete opposite of Hikaru, who shone like the sun and whose eyes resembled the ocean. But he could live with that, he supposed. It didn't really matter.

For some reason, he kind of liked Hikaru, too. She smiled a lot, and she even smiled at someone like him, who never smiled back. She laughed at him a lot, too, but then again, so did Makoto. So whatever, thought Haruka, his eyes drifting to land briefly on the blue-haired girl, who was now engaged in a conversation with Kou.

"Eh? Haruka, I assumed you had good grades," said Hikaru all of a sudden, and Haruka was forced to pay attention upon hearing his name. He frowned when he registered her words. Sure, he didn't have amazing grades, but they were okay. And then, her totally-not-okay usage of his name struck him.

"Don't call me that."

Makoto smiled from beside him. "Haru's too focused on the water," he said. "He doesn't care about much else, so sometimes his grades suffer."

"What? That's bad, _Haruka_!" Okay, now she was using his full name – his girly name – on purpose. He gave up on trying to correct her; she was like Nagisa, and Nagisa didn't listen. Hikaru pointed an accusatory finger at him. He just stared at her. "The water is awesome, but your grades are important too, you know?"

He resisted the urge to make a terrible comeback (" _you're_ awesome"), stared into her clear blue eyes, and shrugged. "They're fine."

"Sure they are," said Hikaru, indirectly challenging him. "Makoto, we should take all the water away from him for a day and make him study."

Makoto laughed sheepishly. Haruka couldn't help his eyes widening in horror at the thought. No! She wouldn't dare! "He might become disagreeable then," said the green-haired boy, and Haruka made a mental note to thank Makoto later. Whatever his motives were, Makoto almost always ended up taking Haruka's side.

"But it could be fun!" said Hikaru, grinning, and even Haruka found it so enticing that he couldn't quite look away. Everyone at the table was entranced by her excitement, even if it was a plot to potentially torture Haruka. "Imagine – we hide all the water and tape up all the sinks and lock all the doors to bathrooms and stuff and just _force_ him to sit there and read stuff! Wouldn't that be interesting?"

Nagisa raised a fist into the air. "Yeah!"

"Nagisa-kun, _shhhh_!" Kou hissed, putting a finger to her lips, but she too looked somewhat excited.

All of a sudden, Hikaru's demeanor changed, and she looked away before taking a deep breath. "I'm just kidding," she said quickly, smiling. "I wouldn't ever want to do that to you, Haruka. Don't worry."

"I'm not worried," he muttered, as their waiter came back with drinks. He looked up briefly to see the waiter staring at Hikaru's bright smile, and kind of wanted to dump water on his head. But that would be offensive to the water.

He stared at the glass of water in front of him and suddenly wondered why he had wanted to dump it on the waiter's head so badly. Anybody could stare at Hikaru, for all he cared. But somehow, it seemed to him like her pure smile was something that ought to be protected, rather than put on display. Like the water. It irked him.

 _Like the water._

There was something about Ikeda Hikaru that reminded him of the water – the water he loved. Maybe it was her eyes, or her hair, or the graceful way she moved, or how quickly her temperament could change, from peaceful to excited to a grumpy pout... And why had her demeanor changed so quickly earlier? Like she had caught herself at the last moment? What was she afraid of?

" – Haru? Haru? Haru!"

Haruka snapped out of his daze and glanced over to Makoto, who was about to start shaking him. "Hmm?"

"I was asking whether or not you've decided on what you're going to get."

Haruka remembered they were in a Western-styled seafood restaurant, scanned the menu, and pointed to the grilled fish. Makoto shook his head, a smile on his face, as though saying _"I should've known."_ To his left, Hikaru was pondering out loud whether to get the shrimp louie or shrimp fettuccini. Clearly, she liked shrimp. She settled on the louie – a good choice, Haruka decided – and beamed at the rest of them for no apparent reason.

The group chatted about the swim club and Makoto's plans in particular, as captain, before starting to talk about competitions and relays.

"I usually swim backstroke," said Makoto, "but I'm alright with anything."

"I like breaststroke," announced Nagisa.

"I only swim free," Haruka decided to cut in, and everyone just sort of had a _"yeah, we know"_ look on their faces. Haruka pretended not to be hurt. Whatever.

Hikaru giggled. "I can swim butterfly," she said. "Well, I can swim anything, but..."

Butterfly would suit her, thought Haruka. It just seemed elegant and graceful – everything the other three boys were not, and everything she was.

"We can trade, if you'd like," offered Makoto, always the nice one. Hikaru laughed and shook her head.

"No, no, it's fine! I'm actually kind of a fan of butterfly. It's destructive."

"Destructive?"

The word hung in mid-air, nobody having expected it. Kou sort of cocked her head to the side. "Well, I guess," she said. "It's... powerful."

"It's not streamlined," Makoto agreed. Haruka thought about the stroke and could agree with its power and its non-streamlined-ness, but he didn't really agree with it being just "destructive." There was beauty in it.

He opened his mouth to voice his opinion when Nagisa interrupted, "It's cool, though, isn't it? Even though it's not the prettiest stroke. I think Haru-chan is a really beautiful swimmer."

Somewhat irritated at having been interrupted (but not really), Haruka said firmly, "Anybody who can swim butterfly well deserves full respect."

They all turned to stare, but he just took a sip of his water and ignored them. Suddenly, Hikaru giggled. "I hope I can swim it well, then," she said, before hooking an arm around his neck. Shocked, Haruka nearly fell forward into the table, but stopped himself just short of it. "Let's go to the gym tomorrow, okay? We can all swim and stuff again!"

Haruka wasn't used to people being so close, particularly girls. He looked away. "Mhmm."

He glared daggers at Makoto and Nagisa, who had their hands over their mouths in silent glee. Just _what_ were those two idiots doing? It wasn't funny that he was being pressured by some hyperactive girl. Well, in any case, at least she'd offered to take him to the pool. He liked that.

Their waiter stopped by again to ask if they were ready to order. Hikaru, bubbly as always, responded with a cheerful "Yup!", unhooked herself from Haruka, and proceeded to order her salad. The waiter was staring at Haruka now, as he scribbled down Hikaru's order. Haruka stared back without any problem at all. Was he trying to challenge him or something? Over Hikaru? Well, the girl _had_ had her arm around his neck, so...

Well, if he wanted to ask her out or something, he could go right ahead. It wasn't any of Haruka's business. He sort of hoped Hikaru wouldn't do something like that again, though, for his well-being.

After dinner, Hikaru stayed true to her word (mostly because Haruka's eyes were glimmering every time he remembered the pool) and got them into the gym for free, again. Her aunt and uncle waved and welcomed them in warmly, like last time, and asked Hikaru how her father was doing (to which she replied "fine, thank you!")

"Ne, ne, let's practice relays!" cried an excited Nagisa, bursting out of the locker room with both hands held high in glee. Hikaru, dressed in a one-piece lavender swimsuit, grabbed Nagisa's hand and they both jumped into the pool together, as Haruka and Makoto emerged from the locker room.

They hit the water with a splash and grinned at each other before resurfacing. Haruka and Makoto were looking at them, Makoto's eyes holding a gleam of amusement, Haruka looking just as stoic as usual. "Practice relays, huh?" Makoto pondered the idea briefly. "Sure."

"Kou-chan, time us!" shouted Nagisa, waving his arms about. Hikaru ducked to avoid being hit in the head. The redheaded girl agreed and went to borrow a stopwatch from the front desk. There were a few other people using the pool, but not many, so they could probably swim in peace.

Kou came back with a stopwatch in hand, as Nagisa and Hikaru hauled themselves out of the pool. Makoto lowered himself into the water, his feet up against the wall of the pool. "Ready, set... go!"

Makoto shot off. Hikaru thought he swam a strong backstroke – not as elegant as Haruka's freestyle, but it was solid. Nagisa climbed up onto the starting block and waited, diving into the water with impeccable timing. Hikaru did a running jump and leapt onto the block, seeing Haruka's somewhat-surprised and somewhat-concerned expression as she did so, before flashing him a peace sign with two fingers. His expression returned to its usual stoic state.

She watched Nagisa swim and couldn't help but imagine him as a little kid, running as hard as he could to keep up with the big kids. Poor Nagisa. Then again, she was a few centimeters shorter than him, so she wasn't really one to talk... but he was a boy! He was supposed to be tall!

She waited, readying herself as he got closer and closer to her, and leapt just as he made contact with the wall, hitting the water gracefully.

Haruka watched her beautiful dive and felt his eyes widen with astonishment – no, admiration – no, just surprise – oh, who was he kidding? She looked like a dolphin. Nagisa said a lot of stuff about how Haruka's dives were beautiful, but now, seeing Hikaru dive, Haruka wondered if he could even come close to that.

She swam with a strong, decisive stroke and yet a strange gracefulness, with it, as though she couldn't quite make up her mind between the two. It was entrancing. Haruka couldn't quite figure out why, but he wanted to watch her swim forever.

"Haru-chan? Haru-chan!"

"Haru, you have to get ready," Makoto gently reprimanded him, as though knowing what he was thinking. He blinked, bringing himself back to the real world, before quickly shaking off his daze and climbing onto the starting block as she neared the wall. The water loved her.

He dove in and swam, wondering if he could achieve the same amount of – what was it? What was it that made her swimming so entrancing?

He cut his way through the water smoothly, suddenly feeling like he was traveling faster than ever before, gliding through the water like a dolphin. When he returned to the wall, he heard the sound of someone clicking the stopwatch button, and then an enthusiastic voice – Kou – shouting, "3:30!"

Nagisa was cheering wildly as Haruka hauled himself out of the pool, shaking his head to flip the hair out of his eyes. He, too, was rather impressed; he'd only swum one relay before, but knew that even Olympic swimmers landed around 3:12 or so.

Hikaru was smiling at him – directly at him – as she handed him a towel. Her blue eyes, several shades lighter than Haruka's, were glittering like the ocean at sunset. "That was beautiful," she said quietly, and he didn't know what to say, settling for a measly "thanks." She seemed to understand, patted him on the head like a little kid, and went to greet her aunt and uncle as they entered the indoor pool to check on them.

"That was the most passionate swimming I've seen you do in a while," Makoto commented from beside him, giving him a small smile. _That_ was it. Passion. That was the word Haruka had been searching for – Hikaru's swimming was so passionate that it gave him the chills.

He turned away from Makoto. Ever since that night with Rin, several years ago, he'd lost much of his drive. His passion had disappeared, though he still loved the water. Watching Hikaru, though, something in him stirred, like a beast awakening. Maybe it was okay to be passionate again, after all. He hadn't even realized he'd lost it.


	3. Chapter 3

**Wowowow I see people reading this! :) Thanks, everyone!**

 **Chapter 3**

"To the establishment of the new swimming club!"

They all cheered and threw their chlorine tablets into the newly-filled pool. Sakura trees grew around the surrounding fence, still beautifully pink as spring continued. It was a bit chilly that day, although the sun was out, and Hikaru just wished it wasn't so cold so that they could actually go into the pool –

 _Splash!_

Hold that thought.

"Haru!" Makoto groaned, seeing his best friend floating in the cold water, seemingly without a care in the world. Hikaru giggled and silently made her way over to the edge of the pool beside Makoto, who was watching her with a dangerous look in his eye. "Don't you dare jump in, too."

"I won't," she reassured him, smiling, and he seemed to believe her and was satisfied. "Haruka, you're going to freeze. And catch a cold."

He ignored her, his eyes closed, floating peacefully through the water. "He's fine, I guess," said Nagisa, grinning. "Why don't we just let him stay there?"

"No, he's not!" shouted Kou all of a sudden, pointing. "His lips are turning blue!"

"Eh?!" Makoto switched modes faster than the speed of light. "Haru!"

Haruka blissfully ignored them still, as Kou ran to get a net or something or other. Hikaru collapsed to the ground, laughing so hard that her abs started to hurt. Even as Makoto and Nagisa coaxed him, Haruka refused to leave the water and completely ignored them, his eyes still closed, looking more content than Hikaru had ever seen him.

Even so, he really was going to be sick soon.

She took off her blazer and tossed it to the side as Haruka drifted in her direction, all the boys (and Kou) running around screaming. She quickly took off her shoes and socks, before diving into the water, aiming for Haruka's floating body.

She hit the water _and_ him at the same time, feeling his warm body beneath her as her senses recognized the freezing cold water. He jolted, instinctively moving away from her, but she grabbed his wrists before he could get too far and began to drag him toward the pool ladder not too far away, trying to stop her teeth from chattering.

In a fierce underwater battle, the two struggled with each other until they eventually resurfaced, gasping for air, Hikaru triumphantly letting go of one hand to grab the railing of the ladder, her other hand circled tightly around the troublesome Haruka's wrist.

Amidst Makoto's worried cries and Nagisa's cheering, she barely managed to haul him over to the ladder, where Makoto and Nagisa assisted her in hauling Haruka out. Man, was _that_ boy a handful!

Haruka sulked after that, as Makoto dragged him to the warm shower and forced him to take one. Hikaru, taking the hint, entered the girls' locker room to take one herself, redressing into her gym uniform (which Kou had brought her) and stuffing her wet clothes into a plastic bag.

"Well, now that _that's_ over..." Makoto actually looked a bit pissed, which made Hikaru kind of scared – no lie. He was a gentle giant, but... also a scary giant. Because all giants are scary, by physical nature.

Hikaru held up her hands in surrender. "Sorry about that, Makoto."

He sighed. "Well, Haru's the one to blame, but... you didn't have to jump in _with him_!"

"Sorry."

"You don't look very sorry!"

Hikaru was trying – and probably failing – to keep a straight face. "No, I'm sorry! I shouldn't have lowered myself to Haruka's level."

Haruka was giving her a look that sort of resembled a death stare. She smiled widely and patted his head, to his distaste.

"You were in there for a while, though," she said, thinking about it. In a last-ditch attempt to get back on Makoto's good side, she suggested, "Why don't we go for some hot tea or coffee? My treat."

"Ooh, that sounds good," said Kou, happily, and Nagisa chimed with his approval, too, leaving Makoto little choice as he glanced over at (the still-shivering) Haruka.

"Alright," the tall boy finally agreed. "I'm not letting you pay for all of it, though. We'll all split the bill."

"Fine," said Hikaru, not really caring either way. They ventured on to the nearest café, which was about ten minutes from the school. Haruka looked cold, but he said nothing and stoically trudged on. Behind them, Kou and Nagisa were arguing about her name again ("I've told you a billion times, it's _Kou_!"), which Hikaru chose to ignore (for once) and, instead, pulled out her phone.

She turned to Makoto, who, thankfully, didn't seem mad anymore.

"I keep forgetting to get your numbers and email addresses," she said, handing her light blue cell phone over to him. He entered in his contact information before giving it back to her.

"Oh, oh, Hikaru-chan! Let me do it, too!"

Her phone was therefore passed around the group until it reached Haruka, who gazed at it impassively for a moment. Just when Hikaru thought he would refuse, he began typing, much to her relief.

They reached the café and Hikaru pulled the door open, holding it for the rest of the group, as a friendly-looking waitress came up to them. "How many?"

Hikaru counted quickly. "Five, please," she said, smiling at the brunette waitress, who nodded and led them over to a booth by the window. Hikaru sat down, to be quickly joined by Haruka and Makoto, while Kou and Nagisa sat down across from them, bickering again.

"Here are your menus," said the waitress, putting down five menus. "Just call me over when you're ready to order, alright?"

"Thank you," said Makoto and Hikaru in sync, and the waitress beamed at them before leaving. Hikaru looked over the menu quickly.

"I think I'll have a milk tea," she said, her eyes scanning down the list of hot drinks. "Well, a latte sounds good, too..."

"Milk tea would be better for you," Makoto declared, ever the mother figure. Hikaru didn't mind, so she just nodded her head and decided she would get that. She was actually more curious about what Haruka would order; over the time they'd known each other, she'd never seen him drink anything other than water.

Haruka sneezed, as though knowing Hikaru was thinking about him, and Makoto hurried to pull out a small packet of tissues from his schoolbag. Haruka blew his nose as the rest of them watched.

"There must be someone talking about me," he declared. Makoto frowned.

"I think you're just sick. It's your own fault from jumping into the pool, you know."

"I'm not sick."

"You are."

"I'm not."

"Well, we'll see who's right tomorrow," said Hikaru cheekily, grinning at the two of them. She winked to Makoto, who was most likely right. Haruka grunted and turned his head away silently, as Kou and Nagisa snickered from across the table. Makoto gave her a grateful smile.

"Are you ready to order?" asked the waitress, coming back, pad and pencil in hand. Hikaru looked around the table as everyone nodded. "Alright, what can I get for you?"

"A milk tea, please," said Hikaru, folding up her menu.

"I'll take a latte," said Makoto – the hypocrite! Hikaru sent him a dark look, which he either didn't notice or chose to ignore.

"Ah, I want a hot chocolate!" cried Nagisa, ever the child.

"And hot tea for me, please," said Kou.

They all stared at Haruka, wondering what he'd order. Coffee? Tea? Juice, even? Water was cold, and Makoto would throw a fit if he ordered something cold –

"Just hot water for me."

Hikaru burst out laughing.

She kicked off her shoes, somewhat-carelessly strolling through the small foyer of their home and into the kitchen, where her father was cooking dinner. "Welcome home," he greeted her, before she could say anything, and so she just raised a hand in response. "Give me a hand with this, will you?"

"What is it?" she asked, moving to wash her hands quickly.

"Curry."

It smelled good – not too sweet, not too spicy, just the way she liked it. She grimaced at the carrots resting on the chopping board, but was glad to see an abundance of chicken (in the pot) and potatoes. "Can we just not throw the carrots in?"

"Nope!"

Sighing, she scooped up the carrots and potatoes, and put them into the wok, where there was a large concoction of curry sauce bubbling. Her father pushed her aside to add some seasoning.

"Serve the rice, will you?"

She took two large bowls and dug some rice out of the rice cooker to put into their bowls, before placing them by the stove. Her father, after deeming the curry done, spooned out a generous amount for both of them, onto the rice, as she busied herself getting two spoons.

" _Itadakimasu!"_ they cheered together, before digging in.

"How was school?" asked her father, midway through. The curry was really good, and she had to swallow her current mouthful before saying,

"Fine. I joined the swim club recently, right? Well, today, we finally filled the pool!"

"That sounds exciting," her father replied warmly, smiling, before shoveling down another spoonful of curry and rice. "Bring your club friends over sometime, won't you? I'd like to meet them."

She snickered. "You won't believe what Haruka did today."

"Haruka again, huh? The one who loves the water?"

"Yeah, him. It's cold outside, right? So we fill up the swimming pool, and right as we're saying, _'oh, too bad it's still too cold to swim,'_ the idiot just goes and jumps in and he's just _floating_ there as we all madly try to get him out. So eventually, I just jumped in after him and dragged him out." Hikaru shrugged. "He's kind of a pain."

"Eh? You won't catch a cold, will you?"

"I don't think so. My immune system's pretty strong, and I was only in there for, like, a minute. Haruka-baka, on the other hand..."

"Now I _really_ want to meet this guy."

"Well, don't forget about Makoto, who's a lot scarier than I had initially thought. He was _so_ mad at Haruka and I for jumping in – it was actually kind of funny. Oh, and Nagisa, who's always jumping around all the time – "

"Sounds like you."

"Oh, shut up. He's worse than me. And then there's Kou – don't forget to address her as _Kou_ , and not _Gou_ , because she'll throw a fit – who's actually really on top of things from what I've seen so far. And she's nice, so I like her."

"I'm glad to see you making friends."

"Haha, me too!"

"Invite them over soon. Next weekend?"

"Well... sure, I guess. We can have dinner or something. We'll eat curry. This stuff is good – wait, Haruka likes mackerel... I wonder if he'd throw a fit if we tried to give him something _other_ than fish..."

 **'Ikeda Hikaru: Hey, my dad really wants to meet you all, so will you be available this coming Saturday for dinner at my place? It'll be fun ^.^'**

Haruka stared at the message for a moment before letting out a deep sigh. It wasn't that he was opposed to going, but –

He sneezed and furiously dabbed at his nose with a tissue. Oh, for heaven's sake, it had already been two days!

What had he been thinking about? Oh, right, dinner with the Ikedas...

He wasn't opposed to going, but parents tended to dislike him, especially initially. He supposed that he came off as a bit reserved and maybe sometimes rude, but... well, he wasn't going to change himself for the sake of other people liking him. Even so, he wasn't sure if he was comfortable with barging into a girl's house and meeting her apparently-enthusiastic father.

He wondered where her mother was, but obviously didn't ask.

His phone _ping_ -ed again, showing a reply from Nagisa. Why had she chosen to put this into a group chat? It was such a pain.

 **'Hazuki Nagisa: I'm definitely going! Can't wait!'**

 **'Tachibana Makoto: If it's not intruding, I wouldn't mind. It sounds like fun :)'**

 **'Matsuoka Kou: Yes, definitely! Thanks for inviting us, Hikaru-chan!'**

That left Haruka. He sighed, mulling it over, before deciding that Makoto and Nagisa, in particular, would bug him forever if he didn't say yes.

 **'Nanase Haruka: Sure. Address?'**

 **'Ikeda Hikaru: My dad is going to be so happy! Thanks guys :)'**

 **'Ikeda Hikaru: Oh thanks for reminding me Haruka, my address is...'**

Haruka stretched himself out on his bed, his phone resting to the side, before deciding a bath would help him in his – as much as he hated to admit it – _sickly_ state. Just as he exited his bedroom, however, the doorbell rang.

He took his time going to answer it, and pulled open the door to see Makoto standing there, papers in hand. "Heya, Haru," he greeted him. "I brought you the assignments for today."

"Thanks," Haruka muttered, before turning to the side to let out another small sneeze. Makoto chuckled.

"I told you so."

"Hn."

Makoto closed the door behind him and followed him to his bedroom. "Do you need help on any of the lessons? We covered some new information in math. Be prepared for the English quiz on Friday."

"I'm fine."

"You sure? Hikaru-san will throw a fit if you fail the tests, you know."

He aimed a "so what?" look at Makoto, who sat down on Haruka's bed.

"She might be a year younger than you, but her grades are good. I'm not much good at English, but since she lived in America for so long – "

"I don't need her help."

"Haru, don't be stubborn," Makoto lectured. "Otherwise, I'm going to call her over right now."

"Don't."

"I'll do it."

"Don't."

"I'll do it!" Makoto had taken out his phone and flipped it open. Haruka grimaced and tried to grab it, but Makoto was taller than him and easily held it out of reach. The greenish-brown haired boy typed for a bit before beaming at Haruka and snapping his phone shut. "Now we just wait for her rep – "

His phone buzzed, and he flipped it open.

"She says, 'Sure, I'd love to! Should I come by now?'" Makoto quoted, before typing and speaking out loud, "Now I'll say, 'Please do. Haru's being stubborn.'"

Haruka groaned, giving up, and slumped into his desk chair. If he said something like "I am _not_ stubborn," Makoto would use that as a testament to his stubbornness. He stayed silent and just stared at the papers on his desk. He really didn't want to do math right now.

"Did you eat dinner yet?"

Haruka silently shook his head without looking at his friend – it was his way of showing his displeasure. Makoto chuckled and stood up.

"Let's go make something, then, before she comes. I'll just tell my parents I'm eating with you tonight."

"Whatever."

But Haruka obediently followed Makoto into the kitchen, where they began cooking – at Haruka's insistence – _mackerel._ Well, and fried rice with vegetables, at Makoto's insistence. Haruka had leftover rice from last night, which Makoto tossed in the frying pan along with other stuff that Haruka barely glanced at. The mackerel was more important.

The doorbell rang just as Makoto was turning off the stove, so Haruka went to go get it, somewhat reluctantly. He pulled the door open to see Hikaru standing there, her blue hair braided down her back rather than in twin pigtails for once, smiling cheerfully. Unable – and unwanting – to conceal his grumpiness, he just gestured inside as she took off her shoes and stepped into the house.

"Hello, Hikaru!" said Makoto, waving. They had long since agreed to call each other simply by their first names, rather than with the "-san" or "-kun" attached. Haruka was pretty sure that Hikaru was the only person who called him "Haruka," which actually irked him because she did it for fun.

"Hey, Makoto," she greeted him. "Smells good. Fried rice?"

"Yup," he said, going to get two bowls from the cupboard, before pausing and glancing at her. Before he could say anything, she had already guessed his intention and said,

"If it's not intruding, I'd love some."

Haruka rather thought that _he_ should be the one deciding, given that it was _his_ house, but Makoto just smiled and said, "Of course."

So that was how he ended up kneeling at the table, Makoto to his left, and Hikaru to his right. At least the mackerel was good, he supposed. The rice was alright, too. Since Haruka lived alone, he was used to cooking and wasn't bad at it, but Makoto, who constantly helped out at home to care for his younger twin siblings, was actually rather skilled.

"Man, this is really good, Makoto!" cried Hikaru. Way to be dramatic, Haruka thought, but that was just who she was. He ate silently as the two of them chatted back and forth in between bites. It was scary how easily Hikaru could intrude (sort of) in on someone's home and dinner, and fit in immediately.

After dinner, Makoto basically forced Haruka to go fetch his school things so that Hikaru could help him with English. Seeing as he didn't have a choice, he did so quietly and compliantly, hearing Hikaru's bright voice chatter on about what she was planning to cook with her father on Saturday, when they would all come over for dinner.

He hoped there would be mackerel.

He put down his assignments and textbook on the dinner table, which Makoto had just cleared (he was currently washing the dishes, despite Haruka telling him he didn't need to). Silently handing Hikaru the assignment from last night, which he hadn't been able to get through, he watched as she read it through as quickly and easily as if it were Japanese.

Then again, she _had_ lived in America for a long time now, apparently. It was probably as easy as Japanese, to her.

"You've mixed up the direct object and the subject of the sentence," she said, pointing. He tried to make sense of the sentence and what he'd done wrong, but it all just looked the same to him. He shrugged helplessly, and she sighed. "Do you even know what a direct object is?"

"It's the thing directly affected by the verb."

"Okay, right. So what's the direct object in this sentence?"

He hesitated, thinking it over. If he'd done it wrong originally, then it must be... "'Skateboard'."

"Right, exactly. So it goes over here – " She pointed with her index finger, as though moving the word from where Haruka had written it to where it should go. " – to here. Get it?"

"Mhmm." He erased what he'd previously written, before rewriting it.

"Okay, good. And as for this one, um..."

She had an odd expression on her face, as though she were trying to keep from laughing. "What?" Haruka demanded, but she just shook her head, smiling, her lips pressed tightly together. Makoto paused in his dish-washing and came over to see what was going on.

"Haruka, you can't just assume that anything water-related is the most important part of the sentence."

"But it is."

"It's not!"

"It is to me."

"But that's not going to get you a good grade!" She slapped her forehead in exasperation as Haruka watched her calmly. Water was always important. "Okay, listen. Water is important and all, but just humor the teacher, alright? She doesn't understand."

"But she's our faculty advisor. For the swim club."

"Yes, but she has to educate you so that universities will want you, too. And _they_ don't understand. Okay?"

"... okay," Haruka finally agreed. She sighed.

"Good. So, when the problem asks you to take out the unneeded word, you can't assume that 'the ocean' is necessarily needed. Yes?"

"It's needed," Haruka replied reflexively. Upon seeing the look she was giving him, though, her clear blue eyes demanding, he remembered what she'd said about the professors not understanding. "The professors don't think it's needed."

"Exactly!" She reached out and patted him on the head, as he drew away. "Read the sentence with what you already took out, and then read it by taking out 'the ocean' instead."

Haruka didn't like speaking English to a native speaker, since she would immediately notice his accent. Then again, she probably wouldn't care. But he didn't like being bad at things, like most people. He sighed. " _'I lay on my back, admiring the ocean.'"_

"Does that sound right to you?"

He blinked. _Was_ it possible to admire the ocean on one's back? Well, maybe if you –

She was giving him the look again. Right. Professors didn't understand.

"No," he said instead, and she nodded in relief. "So, _'I lay on my back, admiring the stars.'_ "

"Yes!" cheered Hikaru, acting way too happy for him getting a single problem correct. Makoto chuckled as she began to dance around the room. Haruka watched her go, wondering how it was possible to be as lively as she was. He certainly couldn't do it.

So he just went to the assignment Makoto had brought for him earlier and glanced down it. It was mostly the same stuff – filling in blanks and composing grammatically-correct sentences. He began to write to the best of his ability and was halfway down the page when Hikaru's voice sounded from behind his shoulder.

"Haruka, it's _'she doesn't want to,'_ not _'she don't want to.'_ "

He realized his mistake in his conjugation and went back to change it. Her long braid was tickling his shoulder even though he had a (admittedly thin) t-shirt on. He thought about asking her to back off, but for whatever reason, decided against it. He supposed that she _was_ doing him a favor, after all, and so he shouldn't complain.

Makoto went back to washing the dishes, clearly deeming the situation fine again. Hikaru cheered every time he got a problem right and stayed silent whenever he didn't, in which case he would go back and try to figure out what he'd done wrong this time. When he finally reached the end of the double-sided worksheet, she lay down on the floor, all four limbs splayed out carelessly.

Haruka suddenly noticed the tinkling sound coming from above them. "It's raining," he commented, and she sat up immediately, surprised. She'd been making so much noise, and Makoto had been washing the dishes, so none of them had noticed. Then again, it _was_ still spring, and storms came and went like nobody's business.

There was a sudden crack of thunder, followed by lightning, and Hikaru frowned. "Well, I'd better get home soon, then."

"Don't," said Makoto, "it's dangerous."

"Yeah, but... I don't want to intrude. I'll be okay."

Before any of them could stop her, she had pulled open the front door, letting a sudden gust of wind in. It disturbed the papers on the table, which Haruka hurried to catch, and watched in a mixture of disbelief and horror as she stepped one foot outside, pulling on her shoes amidst the howling wind.

"Wait, Hikaru!" Makoto hurried over to her as Haruka trapped all his loose papers under heavy textbooks. "At least let me walk you home – "

There was a sudden peal of thunder and lightning, and Haruka could clearly see how heavy the thunderstorm was. It wouldn't be safe for either of them to leave right now; an umbrella would be absolutely useless against the raging wind (and might cast them as an easy target for lightning), and running through the rain would leave them soaked and probably sick, as he was at the moment.

As though on cue, he sneezed. Makoto and Hikaru were still standing by the doorway, Makoto hesitant to go and Hikaru somewhat determined to make it through the storm. Haruka sighed.

"Both of you can stay," he said firmly, leaving no room for argument. He walked over and pulled the two of them inside by their wrists, shutting the door with his foot and locking it. "Going outside now would be dangerous. You can take turns in the shower and borrow my clothes. There's a lot of space here if you need to spend the night."

Makoto smiled at him, but Hikaru was staring at him, open-mouthed. Haruka stared back, not getting what was so weird about what he'd just said. All of a sudden, she threw her arms around his neck and he staggered under her weight. "Haruka!" she sang, as he tried to escape. "That's the most I've ever heard you say!"

"Get off," he commanded, but to no avail. She clung to him like a leech, and he cast Makoto a pleading look, but the tall boy just shrugged. "Get off!"

She laughed and released him, patting him on the head. "I'll take a shower first, then," she said. "Good thing I finished all my homework early, huh?"

"I'll show you around," Makoto offered, as Haruka just stood there in a mild state of surprise, and she accepted happily, following him down the hall to where the bathroom and spare bedroom were.

Haruka shook his head and inspected the kitchen, but Makoto had already washed and put all the dishes in the dishwasher to dry. He didn't have anything to do, so he just returned to the table and began working on his math homework.

"Haruka, I forgot to ask you for clothes earlier!" he heard her shout a while later. Makoto raised his eyebrows at him from across the table, so Haruka sighed, got up, and went to fetch a t-shirt and shorts for her to wear. He opened the bathroom door a tiny bit, threw the clothes in, and returned to the living room.

She came out moments later, dressed in his clothes and holding her own to her chest, crumpled in a small ball.

"Do you have a plastic bag I can put this in?"

Haruka resisted the urge to sigh again and went to get a plastic bag for her. She smiled happily at him, dumping her clothes into it. "Makoto, you're next," he said to his friend, who just nodded and trotted off to the bathroom.

"How's your homework going?" she asked, following him back to his table, where all of his assignments were spread out.

"Fine."

He offered no further explanation, and she didn't ask for any. Instead, she watched him work, not quite understanding the concepts since he was a year ahead of her, somewhat entranced by the way his deep blue eyes moved across the paper. People thought Hikaru's eyes looked like water, but Haruka's did, too – deeper, darker water.

When he had finally worked his way through his assignments – sneezing every once in a while, which Hikaru laughed at – he got up to make them some tea, announcing his intentions when Hikaru asked. "Oh, you can go shower," she said quickly, getting up. "I'll make the tea. Really! Go! Just don't spend an eternity in the tub, yeah?"

He cast her a dubious glance before shrugging and leaving her and Makoto in the kitchen. Makoto fetched the teapot and green tea leaves, so she filled up the teapot and set it on the stove to boil.

"Sorry about Haru," said Makoto quietly, in case Haruka overheard. "He can be a bit difficult. And stubborn."

"I've noticed," said Hikaru, giggling, as they both leaned against the counter. "But it's fine. He's really a nice person, obviously, so it's all good. You guys have been friends forever, huh?"

Makoto nodded, before remembering something. He'd started to forget about it, since Hikaru had become a constant presence in his life, but things hadn't always been this way. "Speaking of which... you used to live around here, didn't you?"

She froze, and for a moment, he thought she wouldn't answer. "Yes."

"Did you... know Haru?"

Her eyes were glimmering again, but not like usual – they weren't full of life anymore; rather, they looked sad, teary, reminiscent. "How did you know?"

"I remembered you," he said quietly. "I saw you once, and Haru came to me running the day you guys first met and told me about you. He was really... entranced by you."

She stayed silent, directing her attention to her feet. She was wearing one of Haru's plain blue shirts, which was several sizes too big for her and nearly covered up the black cotton shorts, which had probably been rolled up at the waistband several times.

"You don't have to answer," Makoto said, finally. "I'm sure you have your own reasons for not telling him."

"I don't..." She clamped her jaw shut, before taking a deep breath and saying, "It's not that I don't want him to remember; it's just that I'm a different person now than I was before. And I wasn't sure if he remembered, and my mom – "

She really sounded like she was about to cry now, so Makoto quickly stepped forward and put a hand on her shoulder. "You don't have to tell me," he said. "You have your own reasons, and you're not obligated to tell us anything."

She clenched her fists. "I'm sorry," she said. "I'm curious to know whether or not he remembers, but... I can't. It's..."

"It's okay," said Makoto, firmly, just as Haru – who had taken an astonishingly short time in the shower – padded almost silently into the room. He let go of the girl immediately, even though they hadn't been doing anything, as Haru gave him a somewhat curious look. _Not now,_ Makoto transmitted back to him with a look of his own.

"If you guys want to watch television, I'll turn it on," came Haruka's voice, as stoic as usual. Hikaru quickly turned away and wiped the tears from her eyes before anybody could see them. Makoto had let go, presumably when Haruka had entered the room.

"Sounds good," said Makoto, always her saving grace. She turned her attention to the teapot, where the water was just starting to boil, and quickly emptied in the tea leaves before grabbing three cups and pouring the tea.

Haruka and Makoto were watching television in the living room when she joined them, putting down their mugs of tea and keeping one for her own. She silently sipped on it as she turned her attention to the news, which – surprisingly – had nothing to do with water at all.

It was the usual murder story, which kind of scared Hikaru a bit (especially with the background accompaniment of lightning and thunder), but she hid her fear and just sipped on her tea. Makoto gave her an understanding look before adding a small smile, which she appreciated. Haruka, on the other hand, refused to look at her.

Unbeknown to her, he was refusing to look at her because he didn't know what he would do if he did. For whatever reason, she had been crying. He didn't want her to cry because he felt like it damaged her... well, her... her _sparkly-ness_ , but what could he do about it? He didn't know what to say. And he probably had no right to budge in, anyway.

Makoto could handle it, and if Makoto couldn't, then nobody could.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Saturday had finally come around, and Hikaru and her father had actually spent an impressive amount of time planning dinner. They agreed on a meal of grilled mackerel with pineapple (mostly for Haruka, who was the most difficult to deal with), curry with rice as per Hikaru's request, steamed broccoli with soy sauce, and some miso soup.

They spent several hours preparing the food, side-by-side in the little kitchen, chatting amiably. Hikaru, for a single moment, let herself think about _that_ and sincerely regretted the fact that her mother and sister couldn't be here with them, but pushed the thought out of her mind almost immediately. She had vowed not to think about it, except on important days.

The doorbell rang, and Hikaru hurried to answer it. To her surprise, everybody except Haruka stood there, smiling. "Hey, guys!"

"Hi, Hikaru-chan!" Nagisa wrapped her in a big hug, and she hugged him back. "It smells good from here!"

Hikaru laughed as Nagisa released her. "Well, I'd hope so."

"Sorry, we couldn't bring Haru with us," said Makoto from the back. "He went on an errand and said he'd meet us here."

"Oh, that's fine," said Hikaru dismissively. What did it matter, anyway, as long as he showed up? "You're not his babysitter or anything. Or his mother. Although you act like it sometimes," she added thoughtfully, and Makoto blanched.

She giggled and, before he could say anything, opened the door wide and invited them in. They all respectfully took off their shoes before entering the house. She led them to the kitchen/dining room area, where her dad was finishing up the last of the broccoli.

"I'll set the table," she said quickly, grabbing the bowls of curry, spoons, and chopsticks for everyone. She rushed to put the mackerel on the table, which everyone half-groaned and half-laughed at, followed by the broccoli. Her father spooned out the hot soup into small bowls, which she took to the table as well, as her friends sat down around the table.

"I wonder where Haru-chan is," said Nagisa thoughtfully, staring at the food before him. "I mean, we can't eat until he gets here, right?"

Hikaru snickered. He sounded concerned for Haruka, but was more concerned about his food. "I've no idea."

Makoto sighed. "I _knew_ I should've dragged him along..."

"Oh, we should do introductions!" Hikaru realized, as her father came up behind her. "Everyone, this is my dad, Ikeda Daisuke. Dad, these are the other members of the swim club."

As her dad raised a hand in greeting, Makoto took it upon himself to begin their introductions. "I'm Tachibana Makoto," he said, "pleased to meet you."

"I'm Hazuki Nagisa! Thank you for the food! It looks good!"

"Nagisa, is food all you think about? Er, I'm Matsuoka Kou. Thank you for inviting us over today!"

"It's a pleasure to meet you all," said her father genuinely, smiling at them. "But aren't you missing someone? Er... _Haruka_ , I think it is?"

Makoto looked unnecessarily guilty, as Nagisa frowned and pulled out his phone, about to throw a tantrum. "I'm calling him right now!"

"Sorry about Haru," said Makoto, and Hikaru actually began to wonder if the two of them were in a mother-son relationship. "He can be a bit... eccentric."

"That's putting it lightly," said Kou, but there was no malice behind her words. Hikaru glanced at her father, who looked back at her. They were both grinning, mostly of amusement.

As though on cue, the doorbell rang, the dinner table erupted in chaos, and Hikaru rushed to open it. As they'd thought, Haruka stood there, looking up at her with his usual calm expression. "Hey," said Hikaru, smiling. "I'm glad you made it. Makoto and Nagisa were about to start throwing a fit."

He gave her a sort of _"of course they would"_ look, before taking off his shoes and coming into the house. Upon spotting Hikaru's father, he began to bow – since he was still standing – but her father stopped him before he could.

"No formalities, please," he said. "I'm Ikeda Daisuke, Hikaru's father. It's nice to meet you – Haruka, is it?"

"Yes, Nanase Haruka," said Haruka, and they shook hands. After that, everything was well again, and they ate happily. They all laughed when Haruka basically emptied all of the fish on top of his curry, and, at Makoto's insistent babbling, began to put some of it back on the plate for other people. Hikaru assured him that the mackerel was for him, anyway, so it was fine.

Her father asked them about the swim club and they launched into a series of stories, often laughing too hard to continue for a while, all the while eating their fill. Hikaru's father wasn't quite as cheery as Hikaru was, but it was obvious where Hikaru had gotten her sparkly personality from. They all kept the conversation alive together, without any one person sticking out, without any awkward silences and barely enough pause to breathe.

As Hikaru began cleaning up the table, her father looked at Haruka intensely and commented, "I feel like I've seen you before."

Hikaru froze, accidentally meeting Makoto's eyes, which gleamed with concern. She quickly recovered, putting the dishes in the sink and going back for more. Makoto insisted on helping and stood up, helping to carry the rest of the dishes to the sink.

"I don't really remember you, but you look extremely familiar," her father continued, and Hikaru's mind spun. How would she get out of this?

"Really?" Haruka's tone held mild questioning, despite still being mostly flat. "Sorry, but I don't remember you at all."

"No, I'm probably mistaken, but..."

There was a sort of gasp, and Hikaru's fists clenched. She was unable to meet Haruka's eyes as she snatched his dishes away from in front of him.

"I remember now! Hikaru, when we lived here a long time ago, there was that boy by the creek who – "

He cut off abruptly as Hikaru turned around quickly, her twin pigtails flying behind her, an expression on her face that Haruka could not describe. It was like a mixture of anger, frustration, and sadness, and, remembering his own days by the creek and _that girl_ , he could only wonder what she was thinking. If, and he had been thinking this for a long time, _if_ Hikaru really was _her_ , then he could only wonder why she hadn't said anything about it. Perhaps she'd forgotten.

If she'd forgotten, he saw no reason to bring it up again, but if they were all on the same page, talking about the same people and the same incident...

Her father remembered.

But the look Hikaru was giving him shut him up immediately, and silence fell over the room for the first time. He wondered if there was a way for him to remedy the situation – should he just deny it all? Would that help?

But if she did remember, and knew it was him, then that might hurt her – assuming that they really were the same people.

Makoto placed a hand on her shoulder and smiled at her father, making Haruka wonder if he knew about their "secret." "The meal was amazing, Ikeda-san," he said. "In return, we'll wash and dry the dishes."

"Oh no, you don't have to – "

"Let us help!" Nagisa cheered excitedly, and eventually, Ikeda gave in. Haruka stood up to help too, but as he was about to walk past Ikeda, the silver-haired man said quietly, so that only he could hear,

"She and I went through some harsh times after she left you."

Haruka didn't understand exactly, but, thinking about Rin, realized that whatever it was, he shouldn't pressure her about it. He simply nodded and continued on his way, where Makoto was insisting on Hikaru taking a break, since she'd hosted them, too.

He didn't miss the way she avoided his gaze and was about to walk past her when she grabbed his wrist, all of a sudden. He stopped and turned to look at her, but she looked as though she were about to cry, and he didn't know what to do. Then, just as quickly as she'd grabbed it, she let go of his wrist and turned away, as though she'd just grabbed it reflexively, without thinking about it.

Seeming to accept Makoto's offer to clean up, she disappeared around the corner. Haruka watched her go before turning to Makoto, who gestured for him to help wash the dishes, while Nagisa and Kou dried them.

"Sorry about that," said Ikeda quietly, walking over to them. "It was such a sudden realization that I didn't think before I spoke."

"That's alright," said Makoto, the only one who seemed to know anything about the situation. Haruka watched him suspiciously. How did he know more about Hikaru than the rest of them? Nagisa and Kou just watched attentively, too. "She'll tell us if she wants to, and if she doesn't want to, then that's fine, too."

Ikeda smiled sheepishly. "I'm glad she's found some good friends like you guys."

"Ne, ne, we're happy to have Hikaru-chan, too!" cried Nagisa, ever the hyperactive one. Kou nodded in agreement, smiling.

Ikeda turned to Haruka in particular and said quietly, "She's changed a lot in the last few years. I wouldn't mind if I didn't know the reason for it, but..."

This confused Haruka. Hikaru was always so happy and cheerful, and she attracted people with her very presence. Had she not always been like that? It was hard to imagine.

It was pretty much confirmed, now, that she _was_ indeed the girl he'd met so long ago – the girl who had pushed him into the sparkling water for the first time. His memory was starting to become a little bit hazy, since it had been so long, but he distinctly remembered her beautiful smile and her glittering eyes. _That_ hadn't changed.

But he thought about it and wondered if the present Hikaru would do something like push him into a creek. Perhaps not – but, then again, she'd been a little kid, so...

It was all too confusing, and Haruka decided to temporarily give up on his train of thoughts, even though it was rather good distraction while doing something as boring as washing the dishes. As they finished up the last few bowls, Hikaru reappeared on the other side of the kitchen.

"I'll be right back," she said, smiling again, all traces of earlier breakdown gone. Everybody turned to stare at her in surprise as she slipped on her shoes. "I just received a text from Kei-san, who owns the dessert place down the street, and she offered to give us some leftovers, so I'll just go get them real quick, and then we can eat them together!"

"Yay!" cheered Nagisa. Makoto nudged Haruka, who frowned in confusion at his best friend before reading his expression: _"Go offer to help her."_

He sighed. "I'll come with you," he said. "It might be heavy."

She was already halfway out the door. "Oh, it's okay, Haruka! Don't worry about it!"

He glanced at Makoto for help, but the tall boy just nudged him harder. _Okay, okay_ , he glared back. "I'm coming anyway."

Without making eye contact with anybody else, he walked out of the kitchen and quickly put his shoes on, before taking long strides to catch up to her. She smiled at him, a bit apologetically. "Thanks for coming with me," she said, and he just nodded. What was he supposed to say? "And sorry about before. I was just remembering some bad stuff, you know?"

"It's fine."

She knew he was curious, but he hid it well with his stoic expression and placid tone. So they continued down the street to where the dessert shop was, Hikaru bubbling all the way about how amazing the cupcakes and ice cream were there. "Hey, what kind of dessert do you like, Haruka?"

"Don't call me that."

" _Haruka._ "

"Don't call me that."

"Haruka-chan?"

He actually had on a different expression now – one of mild disgust. "Please no."

She burst out laughing, and he turned his head away again. "Anyway," she said, when she'd recovered, "what kind of treats do you like?"

"Anything is fine. Nothing too sweet."

"Eh? But sweetness is the point of desserts, isn't it?"

"Lemon tarts aren't too sweet. And some types of cheesecake."

"So you probably don't like cupcakes."

"No."

"What about ice cream?"

"It's fine."

"I know! We should get you some sorbet!"

"I don't really care."

Despite his apparent unwillingness to talk – which was so like him – Hikaru wholeheartedly enjoyed his company. If she talked too much, most people would snap at her to shut up or something; Haruka, on the other hand, would probably just zone out and stop listening altogether, which basically meant that she could talk all she wanted.

She pushed open the glass door to the dessert shop and gestured for Haruka to walk in as she held the door. The aging lady behind the counter smiled at them as they entered. "Hello there, Hikaru-chan! I heard you have guests over today."

"Ah, did Kei-san tell you?"

Speak of the devil, and he shall come. A young man around their age appeared through the side entrance, smiling at them as he entered. "Hey, Hikaru-san."

"Hello, Kei-san!"

Haruka studied the other boy briefly. He was a bit taller than Haruka and had short brown hair and brown eyes. He wore the same apron as the older woman – presumably his mother. He seemed nice, Haruka supposed.

Hikaru had approached the counter and was gazing at the leftover treats behind the glass display. "These all look so good," she said, and although he couldn't see it, Haruka knew she was beaming.

"Ah, I'm sorry for being rude," said the woman, and Haruka glanced up at her in mild surprise. "I'm Yamamoto Yori, and my husband and I own this shop. This is my son, Kei."

"I'm Nanase Haruka. Nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too, Nanase-san," said Kei, smiling warmly at him. Haruka wondered if he should smile back, but wasn't really sure how, so he just nodded at the boy. "Are you one of Hikaru-san's classmates?"

"Oh no, he's a year older than me, but we go to the same school," said Hikaru, still focused on choosing desserts. "We're in the swim club together, so my dad invited everyone over for dinner today. Ne, Yori-san, can we really have all of these?"

Yori laughed. "Of course, dear. It's the end of the week, so we definitely won't be keeping anything – we like to make new ice cream at the beginning of the weeks, too, so take whatever you'd like. Your father always helps us out so much – we really appreciate it."

Hikaru was shining again, somehow. "That's so nice of you, Yori-san! Then we'll take this for Makoto, and this one for Nagisa, and this is one of my dad's favorites... I'll have some ice cream, please – the usual chocolate and coffee. Haruka, what would you like?"

She spun around to face him questioningly, and he just kind of shrugged. He didn't really care about sweets, but he'd eat them if they were placed in front of them. She frowned.

"You really don't care? Then I'll choose something for you!"

Haruka let her do so, watching as she examined the cases carefully before pointing to a small slice of cake that he couldn't quite see.

"I think this one," she said, and Yori nodded approvingly, taking it out of the glass display and putting it into its own box. The older woman whispered something to the girl as Haruka watched, causing the girl to giggle and nod in agreement. Haruka had a bad feeling they were talking about him.

Yori and Kei waved them off warmly. Hikaru had insisted she could hold everything on her own, but, thinking about what Makoto's reaction would be, Haruka shook his head and forcefully took the three bigger boxes away from her. He wasn't really sure why she'd bought an entire cake for Nagisa, but then he thought about the hyperactive blonde and supposed he could eat it. Makoto, on the other hand, would receive a much smaller cake, which was fitting. He wasn't quite sure what she'd gotten for him, though.

They returned to her house in a few minutes, kicked their shoes off (well, Haruka took his off nicely, but she just literally kicked her feet and her shoes came flying off, almost hitting the wall), and entered the house. "I'm home!" she yelled loudly, announcing her presence even though they'd probably heard the two of them come in.

The four of them were sitting around the table, playing a card game. Hikaru set down her boxes at the edge of the table, and Haruka did the same.

"Here, this one's for you, Nagisa," she said, handing him the largest box. Nagisa opened the box and beamed happily when he saw what was inside.

"Eh? Nagisa, you can't eat the whole thing – you'll get a stomachache!" fretted Makoto. It was a huge chocolate cake, complete with icing and more chocolate on top. Haruka could definitely see why it was a great choice for the blonde in terms of what he _liked_ , but a terrible choice in terms of his health.

"But I want to!"

Before any of them could even blink, Hikaru had appeared between the two boys and cut the cake in half, putting one half skillfully onto a large plate and handing it to Nagisa. She took away the rest of the cake before he could protest.

"Hikaru-chan!" Nagisa whined, but Hikaru just smiled, shook her head, and put the box in the fridge.

"Makoto, this one's yours."

It was a much smaller fruit tart, which Makoto was clearly impressed by. "Thank you, Hikaru. This looks really good – Nagisa, don't start eating yet! You don't even have a fork!"

Ikeda laughed and got up, heading for the silverware drawer as Hikaru continued to open cake boxes.

"Here, Kou."

It was a small strawberry cake. Haruka was extremely impressed by Hikaru's choices; even though she'd only known them for a month or so, she had already accurately guessed their food preferences.

"Haruka, sit down. This one's for you."

Haruka, rather curious, opened the box. Everyone gathered around him to see what Hikaru had picked out for him, probably assuming he'd be the most difficult one to choose for. Then again, Haruka could see their logic in thinking that.

It was a blue cake, first of all – a color in between that of his eyes and that of Hikaru's. "It's an ice cream cake," Hikaru supplied, smiling at him. "The color's pretty, isn't it? And you said ice cream was fine, so..."

Her expression changed abruptly as he glanced up at her impassively. He was impressed, to say the least.

"Um... I hope you like it. I wasn't really sure what to choose for you, really, but I thought maybe the color and the – "

"It's fine. Thank you."

Her mouth was still open, and she quickly closed it, recovering from her surprise. She smiled. "I'm glad."

Her father's cake was a cheesecake, and she'd gotten a pint of ice cream for herself. Haruka rather thought the cake was good; the vanilla ice cream wasn't too sweet, and there wasn't a ridiculous amount of icing on the cake – and, more importantly, the cake was blue.

Even though he'd told himself not to think about it, all he could think about was Hikaru's reaction when her father had begun to recount their first meeting, by the creek. What had happened after she'd left Japan? He was just as in awe of her now as he had been then, but...

Something _was_ different about her now. He just couldn't quite figure out what it was.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

He had successfully gotten himself past the front counter, without any trouble at all ("Hello dear, by yourself today? Where's Hikaru-chan? Well, go on in."), and he headed for the pool, which was bound to be empty by now. It was getting late, and although the gym would close in half an hour, the owners seemed to be okay with him staying longer ("We trust you, and you're such a good swimmer. It's nice to see today's youngsters so passionate about something."), so he would take full advantage of it.

He dove into the pool without hesitation and began to sink to the bottom, staring up at the glimmer on the surface of the water. He knew it was due to artificial lighting, but it still reminded him of the time he'd first met her.

He had seen such a beautiful sight that day that he'd been absolutely hooked on the water – even more hooked than he had been before, staring down at it from above. Being _in_ the water was just so much better.

He had accidentally floated back up to the surface, so he took a deep breath and submerged himself again. This time, he expelled the air out of his lungs and let himself sink all the way to the bottom.

 _"What's your name? I'm Ikeda Hikaru, and I'm three years old!"_

 _"I'm Nanase Haruka. I'm four."_

 _"Oh, so you're older than me! No fair! But just watch, Haruka – I'll catch up to you in no time!"_

 _Haruka didn't bother bursting her bubble and refrained from telling her that it was literally impossible to catch up to someone else's age. So he just nodded. The two of them were sitting by the water's edge, their feet in the water, watching the creek flow by._

 _"Ne, Haruka, we have kind of similar names, don't you think? If you take out the... oh, I don't know. If you take something out of your name, you sort of get Hikaru, right?"_

 _Haruka stared at her. "Not really."_

 _She pouted. "Yes you do! Hi-ka-ru and Ha-ru-ka! The 'ka' is the same!"_

 _"And the 'ru'."_

 _"Yeah, see?"_

 _He'd just accidentally proven her point, so he just shrugged and nodded. She was cheerful but rather pushy, unlike Makoto, who usually let him do what he wanted. Hikaru pushed and pulled until she got her way._

 _He saw her again there the next day. "My mommy said you sound like a nice boy," she informed him casually, and he just nodded and sat down by the water. He wanted to touch it again. He wanted to submerge himself in it again. "Ne, ne, you should meet Nee-chan! She's the one who taught me how to swim, although I'm not good at it yet."_

 _He was still staring at the water._

 _"Let's swim together, Haruka!"_

 _"Don't call me 'Haruka'. It's a girl's name."_

 _"But it's pretty. Like the water. Who cares?"_

 _"Well, the people at school..." He trailed off, hugging his knees to his chest, thinking about the times he'd been teased. Makoto, who also had a rather girly name, had always stood up for him, but even so..._

 _"So? They're all dumb," the girl declared. She was a head shorter than Haruka, but her presence made her seem much larger. "I like your name."_

 _"I, er... like your name, too...?" It came out sounding like a question, but she seemed satisfied and turned to the water._

 _"Let's go swimming!"_

He broke the surface and gasped desperately for air, his vision starting to turn blurry and his lungs aching. He hadn't thought about her in a long, long time, and now it was coming back to him. She had _always_ called him "Haruka." She had always liked his name, even when he'd hated it, even when he'd eventually come to terms with it.

He suddenly frowned. She'd had a mother, and a sister who'd taught her how to swim... so where were they? Why was it just her and her father at home?

It was none of his business, he decided, floating this time, rather than sinking. But even so, a hazy image of three-year-old Hikaru drifted into his mind, and he wondered how she'd changed.

They jumped into the water together, holding onto each other's hands so that they wouldn't get washed away. She felt the cold water envelop her, engulfing her senses, sending a strong shock through her body. Her grip tightened on his hand.

"C-Cold!" She shivered, still holding onto his hand tightly. He agreed, nodding his head.

"It's spring, after all."

She looked up at the cherry blossoms in full bloom, and smiled. "Spring's pretty, isn't it?"

"Yeah."

They drifted down the creek slowly for a while before finally struggling out of the water. They were dripping wet, it was freezing, and the cold air against their wet skin only made it worse. They clung to each other, shivering, both wishing they'd brought extra clothes along.

"Hikaru! There you are!"

A sudden shout made both of them jump, and they turned to see a taller girl striding toward them purposefully, a towel in her hand. She had silvery hair and darker blue eyes, but otherwise rather looked like Hikaru. She couldn't be much older than ten or eleven, but that was an entire seven years older than little Hikaru.

"Nee-chan!" cheered Hikaru, temporarily forgetting about the boy and running toward her older sister, who smiled but quickly wrapped the towel around the child, rubbing her with it to get her warm. "Nee-chan, look! This is my friend Haruka!"

Hinata glanced at the shivering boy, smiled and called him over. "You guys can share the towel," she said, and so they huddled close, pulling the towel around them. "Hi, Haruka! I'm Ikeda Hinata – nice to meet you!"

The boy extended one quivering hand, and they shook. Hikaru giggled. "I told you about him yesterday."

"Yes, you did," said Hinata, amused. "This is the guy you pushed into the water, right?"

"Mhmm!"

"Don't sound so proud about it! What if he's hurt?"

Hikaru hadn't considered that, and turned to Haruka with big, worried eyes. "Are you hurt?"

He shook his head, so her smile returned. Hinata shrugged and said, "If you go swimming when it's still cold out, you'll get sick."

"That's okay," said Hikaru immediately. "I like the water."

Haruka nodded in agreement, and Hinata sighed. "But you guys don't like getting sick, right? Mom and Dad will be sad if you do."

"B-But..."

"And Hikaru, don't go running off all the time, okay? Mom and Dad are busy packing, so they can't go out looking for you. So I've gotta do it, but I have to pack, too."

Hikaru's eyes were big and teary.

"Hikaru..." Hinata sighed.

"I don't wanna leave!" Hikaru cried, and Hinata reached out a hand to comfort her little sister. This had happened many times already; Hikaru liked their house, and she liked the town and their neighbors, and she didn't understand why they had to move. Hinata would have to think of another way to calm her down.

"But we'll go to an even better place! And a bigger house, like a castle!"

"But Haruka won't be there!"

Hinata drew her hand back, surprised. Hikaru had only known this boy for two days, and she was crying about him? Then again, she thought, Hikaru hadn't really started school yet, so she didn't have any friends her age. Perhaps Haruka was her first – and only – true friend.

Haruka was surprised, too, despite not really knowing what they were talking about. "Where are you going?" he asked, with all the innocence and curiosity of a four-year-old.

"We're moving to America," Hinata explained, and he had to think about where America was. "Hikaru, we'll come back and visit, okay? And then you guys can see each other again! Won't that be fun?"

Hikaru cheered up a bit, but was still clinging to Haruka. "Can Haruka come?"

"He has to stay with his own family, Hikaru, or they'll miss him too. You don't want them to be sad, do you?"

She slowly shook her head.

"Exactly. Haruka, would you like to come home with us briefly? We live really close, so you can at least dry off and spend some time with Hikaru. It'll be fun!"

"Okay," the blue-eyed boy agreed...

...

Sunset, the next day. Glittering water. Glittering eyes full of tears. A hesitant glance down at the flowing water beside them.

And a voice: _"What are you afraid of?"_

"Ne, Mako-chan, since Hikaru-chan's a girl, can she swim the relay with us?"

There was sudden silence among them, and Hikaru looked up. She'd forgotten about the gender issue. Makoto frowned, thinking about it. "I'm not sure, actually," he admitted. "Can someone look it up?"

"I've got the handbook right here," said Kou, pulling a thin pamphlet out of her bag. They all waited as she skimmed through it. Hikaru munched on an _onigiri_ , as usual, before noticing that Haruka had no lunch.

 _"But Haruka won't be there!"_

She jolted, suddenly remembering the dream she'd had last night – but it hadn't just been a dream. It had happened.

She forced the thought out of her mind, afraid she'd start crying again, and offered Haruka one of her _onigiri_. He glanced at it for a moment, and then at her, and for a moment she thought she detected a hint of sadness in his eyes. But then he took it, mustering up a small smile as a _thank you_ , and ate it.

"Ah, right here! It says that females and males have to compete separately in the individual events, but you can do what you want for the medley relay." Kou looked up triumphantly. "Thank goodness!"

"Yay!" cheered Nagisa, and Hikaru giggled.

"That's good! Now you guys don't have to find a fourth member or anything."

"Yeah," Makoto agreed, but Nagisa suddenly looked thoughtful.

"There's a guy on the train who would be a perfect fit," he said. "I'm going to convince him to join the swim club!"

"Eh?" Makoto blanched. "Nagisa, you can't – "

"Don't be mean to the poor guy," said Hikaru, looking like she wanted to laugh. Haruka frowned. For some reason, he'd expected her to be all for it. But maybe he'd been thinking of the little Hikaru – the one who'd pushed him into the creek.

"I'm not being mean! He's even a guy with a girly name – Ryuzaki Rei! He'll fit right in!"

Needless to say, they couldn't do anything to convince Nagisa out of it, so they just gave up and let him do what he wanted. After school, Kou got right to work on forming a practice regimen for them, which Hikaru helped her alter as they waited for the guys to arrive. Haruka was surprisingly slow, thought Hikaru.

"Here! Practice regimens!" Kou held up the pieces of paper and distributed them out. They all differed slightly depending on what the individuals needed to work on – Haruka, for example, needed to work on his turns and his stamina. Makoto's stroke was weak. Nagisa wasn't fast enough for several reasons. Hikaru wasted some energy in her stroke and would need to streamline it further.

They all got to work in different lanes, swimming relentlessly. Hikaru, unable to completely get last night's dream out of her head, literally dove into her training head-first and refused to leave the pool or even take a break until Haruka himself had to drag her out, Makoto lecturing her about overworking the entire time.

"This isn't good for you," Makoto was saying, but Hikaru didn't really care. It was better than self-harm, since she needed a distraction. So, as soon as she drank some water and ate one of Kou's cookies, she dove right back into the pool amid Makoto and Kou's protests.

When practice ended around six – which was when it usually ended – Haruka took it upon himself (after some prodding from Makoto) to drag Hikaru out of the pool and to make sure she showered and changed in the locker room and _didn't go back into the pool._ She tried, once, but found an impassive wall of muscle blocking her way. _Literally._

"What are you doing?" Haruka asked her as they headed home. Makoto was chatting with Nagisa for once, about whatever.

"What do you mean?"

"You're not yourself today."

She wanted to scream. What did he know? What did he know about _her_? But she thought of Hinata, briefly, and quelled her anger. "I don't know what you mean."

"You're doing it again. You want to say something, but you don't. You want to express something, but you don't." His eyes were blue. Very blue. They hadn't changed from the first time she'd met him.

He was staring at her, and she couldn't help but stare back, trapped in his blue eyes. And he said,

 _"What are you afraid of?"_

And then she broke down crying.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

Haruka still had his arms around her. Her eyes weren't shining anymore; instead, they were dull and tired from crying. The usual energy and radiance surrounding her was gone, and she clung to Haruka like he was her lifeline. They sat on the sofa in silence. He waited, listening to the clock tick on and on and on.

Finally, she spoke. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be."

There was silence again. "I owe you an explanation, don't I?"

"You don't owe me anything."

"No, I do," she insisted, her eyes still teary as she looked up at him. "What am I afraid of, right?"

She let out a watery laugh that made Haruka sad. He probably looked just as stoic as usual, but inside, he wasn't stoic at all. He was frightened, nervous, a bit scared, frightened, and nervous. And did he mention he felt a bit scared?

Not to mention concerned. He was genuinely concerned for this friend of his who had opened up so many possibilities for him in the past, and had given him free access to a pool, and had brought life to their group with her cheerful demeanor. Everyone at school was always staring at her, and yet she only stared at – she only _really_ stared at – the four of them.

He thought about little Hikaru and her older sister, who had been so nice to him, and he thought about the way she always looked like she wanted to say something and then didn't, and he thought about how beautiful she was, even when she was crying –

He caught himself. Why was thinking about that, again?

Well, it was true. Everyone in the world knew it.

He tried not to think about the fact that her head was on his chest. They wouldn't ever bring this up again, he was sure, and this was a moment of weakness. She was allowed to lean on friends, both metaphorically and literally.

"I'm sure you've realized by now that I met you a long time ago, by the creek," she said, and Haruka let out a small grunt of agreement. "Right. And so you remember my sister, right? Hinata?"

"Yes."

"And my mother and father?"

"Somewhat."

"Well, Hinata was always taking care of me when I grew up. My parents were really nice and all that, of course, but since Hinata was so many years older than me, she was like perfect mixture of parent and best friend. She was always a really nice person – fits her name, I think – and no matter what, she always said nice things to people. I don't think I ever heard her utter an insult to anybody."

Haruka began to suspect he knew where this was going, but kept deathly quiet.

"I really admired her." Tears were forming again in her beautiful eyes. "She was everything to me. I loved her, and I admired her, and I wanted to be her. Although my parents loved me, it was always obvious to me that they loved her more. And sometimes I'd feel envious, but I always understood how they felt. It was impossible to look away from her. She was perfect."

 _Nobody's perfect_ , Haruka wanted to say, but didn't dare.

"So we moved to America, right? And one day, when I was thirteen, I was sitting at home when the doorbell rang. My father was just starting to wonder where my mom and Nee-chan had gone off to, since they'd been coming back from her piano lesson – she was an amazing pianist, too – and I pulled open the door and there was a big police officer there. And he said to me, 'Are you Hikaru Ikeda?' In English, of course. I'll never forget his voice, saying that – _'Are you Hikaru Ikeda?'_

"And my dad came up behind me and wanted me to go away, but I refused. I wanted to know what was going on. I was old enough to understand what had happened – on their way home, my mother and sister had been hit and killed by a drunk driver. A drunk driver! Someone who'd had no previous criminal record, who would be haunted for the rest of his life, who had made a mistake once and had ended the lives of my precious sister and mother."

She was sobbing now, and Haruka instinctively held her tighter, hoping it would help. Where was Makoto when you needed him? She continued on through her tears,

"We had a funeral and all that, and I spoke about my sister, and then one day, I looked at my suffering father and wondered what life would be like if I'd been killed rather than Nee-chan. So I tried it. I became her, and I was happier, at least on the outside, and the people around me seemed happier, and my father seemed happier. Nee-chan always had this way of spreading happiness to other people, and now I was doing it, too. It seemed like the only person who was still suffering was me, deep inside, but I didn't let it out.

"I got used to being her, I guess. And we moved back here because my father missed Japan and because we both wanted to get away from our grief, and you know the rest."

It all added up now – why she always seemed to hesitate, why she would want to say something and stop, why she was different from back then.

"I... I was influenced a lot by Nee-chan, so I don't think there was a tremendous amount of difference, but... she was happier, and kinder. I mean, I pushed you into a creek! She would never do something like that. I was more sarcastic and snappy, I guess."

"I didn't know you in America," said Haruka, speaking for the first time in a while, "but I don't think you've changed all that much. You were always a lot like your sister, from the start. And it might've brought your father temporary happiness, but at the end of the day, wouldn't he prefer for you to be yourself?"

She was silent for a moment. "I know. I know I can't replace her, but..."

"Just be yourself," said Haruka. "You have friends who'll love you for who you are, no matter what. It's not like you're the most difficult person they've ever dealt with."

She mustered up a smile, and Haruka counted that as a success. "You're right," she said, "that's you."

He was surprised for a moment, before realizing that this was her true self starting to peek through. So he just reacted as he usually would – by turning his head away and saying nothing.

The sun was setting. It was nearing dinnertime. Neither of them moved.

"Thank you, Haruka."

"For what?"

"For saving me, I guess. That sounds so cliché! But it's true, sort of – you made me realize that I don't have anything to be afraid of. If I go back to being myself, nothing's going to change. Right?"

"Right."

"That's good, then. Now I can finally tell Makoto he needs to man up, and tell Nagisa to shut up sometimes, and tell Kou to stop staring at muscles and actually do something. Oh, and to tell _you_ to stop jumping in every single body of water you find. How were you expecting to fit into a fish tank?"

Suddenly, they were both laughing, shaking uncontrollably, and Haruka wondered how she'd managed to get his emotions to rise to the surface, instead of resting at the bottom of the pool, where they usually remained. They laughed until their sides and tummies hurt, tears streaming down Hikaru's face (again, but happy tears this time), Haruka trying his best to stop but to no avail.

 _"I'll be your guardian angel,"_ she'd said, and he wondered if he had returned the favor, finally.

It was summer vacation, and Hikaru had stayed true to her word. She did her best to shave off her sister's exterior after that. "Makoto, stop being a wimp! If you want something done, go do it!"

They all gawked at her sudden change in attitude, but Haruka remained unaffected, floating peacefully in the pool.

"And Nanase Haruka, get out of the water so Kou can make an announcement!"

"Hikaru-chan," said Nagisa, wide-eyed, "what happened?"

"Nothing," said Hikaru. "But I did realize that I was trying too hard to be someone else, so I stopped."

She still attracted attention wherever she went, and was still overwhelmingly kind and lively, but at times like this, she got things done. She attracted attention in a different way, now. Haruka climbed out of the pool and stood with the others, waiting for Kou to speak up. Nothing had really changed, except that Hikaru had become less of a wimp, per say, and had picked up her old somewhat-sarcastic, somewhat-snappy habits again.

He kind of liked it better this way; she was even livelier now, if that was at all possible.

"Anyway, look what I found!" Kou held up an old, yellowing document. They peered at it.

"Training camp from hell?"

"It was used by our predecessors," Kou explained. "We'll go to the ocean and swim from one deserted island to the next – that's four kilometers of swimming total, and about one kilometer of running."

"Sounds fun!" cried Nagisa. "Deserted island!"

Rei sniffed, pushing his glasses up his nose. He was clearly not too fond of the idea.

"What do you say, Captain?" asked Kou, and Makoto frowned. Hikaru didn't miss the way his forehead wrinkled as he considered it, and the flash of fear in his eyes. But even so, he just smiled and said,

"Sounds like a great idea."

"Awesome! Then we'll leave this weekend and come back the next!"

They were all cheering as they went off, save for Makoto and Haruka. Hikaru stopped cheering as soon as she noticed and doubled back to the two of them, who were sort of staring at each other, as though they were having a silent conversation. Well, Hikaru supposed, they probably were.

"I don't mean to intrude," she said, "but if you don't like the idea, then don't agree to it."

"No, no," said Makoto smiling, "it's a good idea, and it'll be good for our stamina. Right, Haru?"

Haruka silently nodded. Hikaru shrugged. "Well, just checking. Don't be a wimp, Makoto. Right, Haruka?"

Haruka silently nodded again. Makoto looked between the two of them and laughed. "Go shower, both of you," he chided, and Hikaru skipped off to the girls' locker room happily. She wasn't sure if it sounded awfully cheesy, but ever since Haruka had set her free, she'd been a whole lot happier. She still missed Hinata a lot, but she was sure that Hinata would want her to be herself.

When Sunday rolled around, they gathered at Coach Sasabe's squid fishing boat. Hikaru shouldered her big backpack and joined the others, waving. Amakata-sensei was coming along too, and Hikaru couldn't quite see her sleeping in a tent, so she was pretty sure the girls would stay at the nearby lodge instead. They'd asked Hikaru, too, but Hikaru had politely declined, saying that she should stay with the boys as a fellow swimmer.

"Off we go to deserted islands!" shouted Nagisa.

"Deserted islands!" Hikaru echoed, to be met by a disapproving glance from Haruka. "Oh, shush, Haruka. Don't be a Debbie Downer."

"A what?"

She sighed. "Never mind. It's an English phrase."

Rei, the new addition to their team, looked like he was about to be sick, and Hikaru actually considered throwing him overboard to "get used to the water" more than once, but decided against it. She'd probably get in trouble, for real.

They made it to the beach safely, where they waved off Coach Sasabe and set up their tents in the sand. Since they only had two tents, courtesy of Makoto's family, three of them would have to stay in one.

They set up the tents and then waded into the ocean, equipping Rei with a kickboard to be safe. For the most part, Hikaru swam the front crawl since it was the easiest, but often switched to a strange mixture of breaststroke and a kick she didn't have a name for. In any case, it was fast enough, and kept her afloat.

They ran, too, which was kind of an absolute pain for Haruka, who really only liked the water. By the time they'd made it back to the beach, they were all exhausted.

"Was the training camp too hard after all?" asked Kou thoughtfully, standing over them as they lay on the sand. "You guys only completed half of it."

"Well, it's only the first day," said Makoto, smiling gently. "I'm sure we'll improve as the week goes on. Speaking of which, good job, Rei."

"A-Ah, thank you! I'll do my best to improve and catch up to you!"

"Don't worry about it," said Hikaru quickly, knowing what it was like to chase after somebody and never reach them. "You just do you."

Haruka sent her a knowing glance as they all struggled up to where several picnic tables were set under a large overhang, and began to take out the mackerel Haruka had brought, and the frozen pizza that Coach Sasabe had supplied them with. Amakata-sensei suddenly gasped. "Oh, no! I forgot to bring the seasoning!"

Kou was helping the boys with the pizza, so Hikaru said, "I'll go borrow some from the lodge or buy it from the convenience store!"

"Thank you!"

She headed up the hill quickly, spotting a small convenience store located as part of the lodge. Heading for it, she nearly ran into somebody head-first. "Ah, sorry!"

"It's fine," the figure grumbled, not sounding very happy. Hikaru looked up and actually gasped out loud when she saw his face. It was confirmed when she saw the _Samezuka_ logo on his friend's jacket.

"Wait, you guys are Samezuka!" she exclaimed, and both boys turned to look at her curiously. "Sorry, I'm from Iwatobi – I'm Ikeda Hikaru. I don't know you, but you're Matsuoka Rin, right? Kou's brother?"

"Eh?" Rin stared at her for a moment before saying to his friend, "Nitori, you go back first."

"Ah, okay, Senpai!"

When the silver-haired boy had gone, Rin motioned for her to follow him, and they sat down on a nearby bench. "So you're friends with Haru and the rest of them?"

"Mhmm," said Hikaru, smiling widely. "They're pretty awesome. They talk about you sometimes, so I know a bit about you – you were in Australia or something, right? That's pretty cool."

"God, you're like Nagisa," he groaned. Hikaru laughed.

"I've been getting that a lot lately," she said good-naturedly. "I heard you guys are using the pool, right? Training camp, I guess? We're doing one, too."

He looked surprised and turned to face her. "But we're using the pool," he said, confirming her earlier question. "Where are they swimming?"

"You mean where are _we_ swimming," Hikaru corrected him. "And we're swimming in the ocean, from island to island. It's way too much work, but it'll really help our stami – "

"Makoto's okay with that?"

Hikaru blinked. "... yes?"

It was then that she remembered Makoto's odd expression that day. She had recognized it because she'd worn it too many times – it was that indecision when you wanted to say something, but stopped yourself.

"Well, I don't know the story behind it, but he probably agreed for the sake of the team," she said, before Rin could say anything. "Hey, sounds like you're concerned about them! Want to train with us?"

He looked disgusted. "Hell no."

"Hey, don't be mean!"

"Go away, you're annoying. All I care about is beating Haru."

And then he was gone. Hikaru watched him go, before wrapping a strand of her hair around her finger and twisting it. "Well," she said to herself, " _that_ was eventful."

She bought small bottles of spices from the store and hurried back to where the others were heating up the food. "What took you so long?" asked Haruka immediately, and for a moment she wondered if he'd seen her and Rin talking.

"Sorry," she said, "I literally ran into someone and had to apologize. Felt bad."

He seemed to accept this answer and dropped the issue. They ate pizza and fish and were thankful for food (for the most part), and eventually headed back to the tents to get ready for bed.

"So Haru and I will be in this tent," said Makoto, but was immediately met with Nagisa's objections.

"But I want to sleep with Haru-chan!"

Hikaru winced at the way that came out, but nobody else seemed to notice nor care.

"Is there something wrong with sleeping with me, Nagisa-kun?"

"No, of course not, Rei-chan!"

Hikaru sighed, picked a tent, and ducked inside, taking her backpack with her and putting it in the corner. "Good night!" she called to them, before climbing into one of the sleeping bags and closing her eyes.

"Wow," she heard Nagisa say, "Hikaru-chan's impressive!"

Moments later, half-asleep, she heard rustling, and somebody entered the tent. She had a feeling she knew who it was; since three people had to share one of the tents, and since Makoto and Nagisa had both wanted to sleep in the same tent as Haruka, she was certain it'd be Rei with her.

So she was shocked to see Haruka's calm expressions staring at her, and couldn't speak for a few moments. "What?" he asked her, sounding a bit irritated.

"Sorry," she said, chuckling. "I expected Rei, since they were all fighting over you. Don't you feel popular?"

He turned away from her and stayed silent, and she giggled before closing her eyes again. Not that it mattered, anyway...

 _"Rei!"_

She was awoken by the sound of Makoto's voice, and sat up, disoriented, before realizing that there was a harsh thunderstorm going on. Haruka was awake, too, and sat up upon seeing her. "Did you hear that?" she asked him, and he nodded. They both immediately scrambled out of their sleeping bags and hurried outside.

It was ridiculously windy and the waves were turning over and over. Haruka peeked inside the other tent and yelled at Nagisa to wake up, before scanning the ocean. Hikaru did the same, suddenly realizing what had most likely happened.

"Haruka, I'm going with you," she said, and he opened his mouth to protest, but she boldly put a finger to his lips, silencing him. "No arguments. Nagisa, run up to the lodge and tell Amakata-sensei and Kou about what's happened."

"No! If you're going, I'm going, too!" shouted the stubborn blonde. Hikaru, who hadn't taken her eyes off the moving ocean the entire time, suddenly spotted a flash of greenish-brown, and took off before anybody could protest. She fought through the freezing cold water, her clothes weighing her down, and tore off her shirt, leaving her in a sports bra and cotton shorts. It was easier to move now, and she frantically headed toward where she'd last seen Makoto – she was sure of it.

The ocean was tossing and turning, and she could barely swim through it, the current always wanting to carry her in a different direction. She gasped for air and saw Makoto's head again, and then Rei's, and quickened her pace through the water. Her muscles burned, and she watched in horror as Makoto's head suddenly began to sink. Was he drowning?

She reached him in a frantic burst of energy, pulled him upwards by his armpits, and searched for Rei, her heart about to burst out of her chest. Luckily for her, Nagisa had appeared, yelling, "I'll get Rei-chan!"

"Makoto!" she shouted, but the boy was unconscious. He was too heavy for her, and she was kicking her legs as quickly as she could, but her head was lowering – she couldn't save both of them –

And, like her guardian angel had come, she was suddenly lifted upward. She gasped for air, meeting Haruka's deep blue eyes. He'd hooked his arms around Makoto's limp body, too, and together they supported his weight.

Hikaru's eyes locked onto the huge wave approaching them. "Oh, no," she whispered, and Haruka turned to look too. In the distance, she heard Nagisa shout,

"No way!"

And then the wave crashed over them.

She and Haruka were both clinging to Makoto's body, but as a girl, Hikaru knew she was biologically at a disadvantage. She let go of Makoto, leaving him to Haruka, and began to swim upwards the best she could, all the while being knocked around by the current. She needed air, _now._

The surface was still so far away. It wasn't glimmering. She couldn't see it anymore, but she knew she wouldn't make it in time. And even if Haruka could save her, it would mean abandoning Makoto, and he couldn't do that.

She didn't have a chance, anyway. She would die here.

She felt her body go limp, as she surrendered to the water. At least she'd meet Haruka again, she thought, closing her eyes.

 _"What are you afraid of?"_

His voice cut through her head, quiet but insistent, and her eyes flew open. Her lungs were burning.

 _"What are you afraid of?"_

She scrambled for the surface, pushing upward with every ounce of will in her body, even as her lungs burned and her vision started to go completely black.

 _"What are you afraid of?"_

She wasn't afraid of dying, but why not struggle her way up before dying? Why not at least try? Haruka would want her to try. Haruka would want her to try before she gave up. She knew it, somehow, because she just did.

But she'd completely run out of oxygen, and she felt herself slipping away, even as she suspected she was reaching the surface. _Sorry, Haruka,_ she thought, frantically reaching upward, _I tried._

And then she was being pulled upward, spluttering and choking and gasping for air, feeling herself being dragged through the water for a few moments before she felt her toes hit sand. And then she was being dragged onto land – sweet, sweet land – where she blinked open tired eyes to meet deep blue ones.

"Haruka," she whispered, still gasping for air, and he responded by putting a hand on her forehead reassuringly. There was no mistaking the concern in his eyes, but he didn't say anything. His hand was cold, as was she, but there was a sort of warmth that spread through her body, emanating from that point.

He moved away too soon, and she turned her head to see Makoto lying beside her, still. Haruka put an ear to his chest, and then a hand to his mouth, checking for breathing. Her eyes widened. If Makoto wasn't okay, then –

"I let go," she whimpered, her hands flying to her mouth. "I let go. Oh my God, I let go."

Haruka said nothing and instead lowered his head, tilting Makoto's head back. Hikaru forced herself up into a sitting position, wondering if she would start hyperventilating, her chest pounding in her ears, guilt wracking every nerve in her body, her lungs still aching.

Suddenly, Makoto spluttered and coughed, just as she had, and Haruka abruptly drew back. "Haru?" she heard him ask, before struggling into a sitting position. "Yeah, I'm alright."

"Let's find shelter from the rain, then," said Haruka, and Hikaru was relieved to see Makoto alive and apparently fine, but guilt was still tearing her apart. What if he hadn't been okay? It would've been her fault.

The rain was still pouring down, and it mixed with her tears. She wondered where Rei and Nagisa were. She wondered if Makoto was really okay, or if his lungs were hurting too, if he was aching all over, if he knew that Hikaru had let him go.

Her sister would never have let him go – she was sure of it. _Why? Why couldn't she just be like Hinata?_

Haruka had convinced her to stop acting like her sister, but what had that led to? She'd _let him go._ He could've died. He was probably on the verge of death, at that very moment when she'd let go of him. Hinata would be disappointed in her. Hinata was selfless. She would never have let go, ever, no matter what.

She realized that she was on the ground again, curled up on her side, trying to block everything out, when she noticed Haruka crouching over her. "Are you okay?" he asked quietly, and she could only stare him at him through teary eyes. "Does it hurt anywhere?"

 _My heart._ Not that he could fix that.

"Hikaru?" He put a hand on her shoulder, and she flinched.

"Is she okay?" Makoto's green eyes drifted into her line of vision. "Hikaru?"

"I let him go," she blurted out, unable to stop it, her eyes wide but unseeing. "I let him go – Nee-chan would never have let him go – Haruka, I let him go – "

"And you almost drowned, too," Haruka pointed out, his blue eyes gleaming with some sort of worry. "If you had drowned then, how would we feel? Would that be better?"

"Hikaru, I'm just glad we're all okay," said Makoto, smiling gently down at her. "That was a frightening situation that we all handled poorly, so there's nothing to blame."

Haruka still didn't look happy, which was backed up when he continued, "You're not your sister, and you won't ever be your sister. Is that not okay? Or do you think we'll only get along with you if you're _Hinata_?"

Calm, placid Haruka was actually mad. Hikaru was too stunned to speak, and a bit afraid of the angry gleam in his eyes overpowering the worry, and she could tell that Makoto was shocked, too.

Hikaru swallowed.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be _sorry_!" Haruka had never, ever sounded so mad, in his entire life, and although Hikaru hadn't been with him his entire life, she could tell from Makoto's expression that he'd never seen this before, either. "Stop being sorry for everything you do! None of this is your fault! Don't compare yourself to what you think your sister would've done, because she's not here – _you're_ here. _What are you afraid of?!"_

He was panting heavily, his shoulders and chest rising and falling, as Hikaru stared at him with wide eyes, trying to comprehend everything, realizing the truth behind his words, wondering why she was thinking about her sister rather than how glad she was that everybody was okay, and Makoto was staring at both of them, shocked at Haruka, sympathetic toward Hikaru, wondering if she would be okay, kind of wishing Haruka hadn't been so blunt...

And then she began to sob freely and threw herself at both of them, nearly knocking them over, an arm hooked around both of their necks and bringing them all together as she cried. Makoto didn't fully understand, but it didn't matter. He watched as Haru hesitantly put an arm around her, and then as he hesitantly lowered his head to rest his chin on her shoulder. He smiled as he hugged both of them.

A long time ago, he'd heard those five words spoken to Haru, and the image was forever engrained in his memory. And now, he thought to himself, _what are you so afraid of?_

As long as his friends were here, there was nothing to be afraid of.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

They had met up with Nagisa and Rei and were now standing in front of a creepy-looking abandoned lighthouse. "Better than nothing, right?" Hikaru had said weakly, and so here they were. They were all shivering, since they all wore pants but no shirts, and it was storming outside.

"I wonder if there are ghosts," said Hikaru, carefree again, venturing forward without waiting for the rest of them. Makoto visibly blanched at this. Haruka sighed and followed her as she pulled open the door bravely.

It seemed relatively safe inside, although abandoned, and they found the kitchen and thought to check it for food.

"There won't be anything edible in the fridge," said Hikaru, cutting Nagisa off as the blonde tried to assign everyone places to look. "The power's out, obviously, so anything in there will be rotten."

So they searched the cabinets and found several cans of mackerel (to Haruka's delight) and a few big bottles of water. Nagisa also found a few aprons with the lighthouse's name and logo printed on them, and distributed them for everyone to at least cover up a bit.

"Okay," said Nagisa, once they had all eaten (mackerel and pineapple, to Haruka's great delight), "let's play a game!"

"What kind of game?" asked Rei, looking a bit frightened – and for good reason, thought Haruka. Nagisa looked kind of devilish – kind of scary.

"A game in which we tell secrets and stuff!"

Although Haruka wasn't too keen on this, he couldn't think of any better way to pass the time, so he stayed silent as Nagisa found some paper, somehow folded it into a cube, and wrote their names on the faces in black marker.

He rolled it across the floor. "And the first one to tell an embarrassing story is... Rei-chan!"

"My name's on three of the faces!" Rei groaned, but thought up a story anyway. "Once, when I was in elementary school, I left my underwear in the locker room during the school trip. And then the teacher came in and held it up and asked whose it was – I was mortified!"

"There, there," said Nagisa, patting his shoulder, as Hikaru and Makoto offered the condolences. "Okay, next is... Haru-chan! Tell us a love story!"

Hikaru watched in wonder as he stood up and seemed to actually think about it. "Er, has Haruka-senpai ever been in love?" Rei whispered to Makoto, who shrugged, looking confused.

"I actually have no idea."

Well, Hikaru thought, if Makoto didn't know, either the love story didn't exist, or it would end up being something like "I saw a waterfall."

"Once, when I was four years old," said Haruka, somewhat dramatically despite his calm tone and expression, "I found a creek near my house."

Hikaru's heart leapt. Was this possibly a story she knew?

"Back then, although I had always thought water was beautiful, I had never touched a running creek or river or body of water. Except for the bathtub," he added thoughtfully, and Hikaru couldn't help but mutter,

"That doesn't count."

"Anyway, I was staring down at the water when a random girl came up behind me and asked why I wasn't touching the water, and when I said I was scared, she pushed me in. Like a jerk."

Hikaru flushed, but continued to stare adamantly at an unfazed Haruka.

"It was a shallow creek, but when my head went underwater, I saw beauty for the first time in my life, looking up at the glittering surface of the water. And I couldn't help but fall in love."

Haruka sat down. Hikaru sighed. Of all stories, that one?

And then she thought about it and realized that she had indirectly been a part of his "love story." If she hadn't been there, she wondered what he would've done. Would he have stared at the water forever, always afraid to touch it?

Nagisa seemed a bit disappointed about the water. "Who was the girl?"

"Just a friend," said Haruka evasively.

"Did you see her after that?"

"Once or twice."

Nagisa sighed and rolled the makeshift dice again. "Next is... Hikaru-chan! Tell us the most prominent story in your memory from your childhood!"

"Can I lie?" asked Hikaru, immediately, and Nagisa's expression turned sour.

"Absolutely not!"

Haruka was watching her attentively, wondering if she would say anything about their encounter. She had hidden it from everyone so far, but now that she was attempting to free herself from Hinata's shadow...

He looked away, ashamed of his own thoughts. Why was he hoping for something like that? What did it matter if their encounter was the most prominent memory from her childhood or not? Surely, she would tell a story about her sister.

She sighed, looking down. "When I was about three or so, my family was preparing to move away to America. I was upset about leaving, so I wandered the small forest behind my house and came across a little creek. There was a boy there, and he was staring down at the water – just staring – and he looked like he wanted to touch it, but he never did – "

"Wait a minute," Nagisa interrupted, but she held up a hand, and he fell silent.

"I went up behind him and asked why he wasn't going to touch it, and he told me that he was afraid. So I said to him – my haughty three-year-old self – _'What are you afraid of? I'll protect you.'_ And with that, I pushed him into the creek, jumped in after him, and made sure he didn't float away or drown or anything. Well," she said thoughtfully, "it was only a few feet deep, so I don't think he would've drowned, but... had to make sure, you know?"

Everyone was absolutely entranced, having already put two and two together. Haruka swallowed hard.

"Anyway, I remember thinking he was a really cool person and he cheered me up when I was sad about leaving. We talked about some stuff – I don't really remember – and then my big sister found us and – "

She was on the verge of tears again, and she looked up all of a sudden to meet Haruka's eyes. Unsure of what to do, Haruka gazed calmly back at her, hoping it would help her regain her footing.

" – and she dried us off with a towel and tried to comfort me about moving again. I went back to the creek two more times after that, but eventually we had to move, and I haven't been back since."

She broke Haruka's gaze and looked down at her knees again. Nagisa said, "Ne, Hikaru-chan... you're talking about Haru-chan, right?"

"Mhmm."

"Wow, you guys knew each other back then?" Nagisa looked absolutely ecstatic, for whatever reason. "That's so cool! And to think that you're the one who sort of started his love for water!"

Hikaru shrugged, seeming to disagree, but Rei added, "That was a beautiful story, Hikaru-san. But what happened after that? Why didn't any of us know about it, even though you two are in the same club?"

Haruka snapped then, his emotions unfolding before he could stop them. "We're done talking about this," he said, and everyone turned to stare at him in surprise, including Hikaru, whose beautiful blue eyes were still rimmed with tears.

"But, Haru-chan – "

"I said, we're done talking about it!"

They all fell silent. Makoto and Hikaru knew that this was the second time in his life, pretty much, that anybody had ever seen him visibly angry.

Hikaru sighed, preparing herself. She couldn't hide any longer, and she didn't want to. She had to stop trying to be her sister, when she would never be her. Haruka was trying to protect her, not Hinata, so she should at least repay his kindness.

"Haruka," she said quietly, and the boy turned to meet her gaze, still looking a bit distressed. "Haruka, this is something I feel like I need to tell them. We're a team, right? We're best friends. And they witnessed my change in behavior – and I told Makoto like a fourth of the story, so – " She couldn't help but giggle at her own words. " – so I should just stop hiding, shouldn't I?"

Haruka looked troubled, but just turned away and said nothing. So Hikaru looked back down at her knees, in case she started crying again. Focus. Just don't think about crying. Just tell the story.

"My older sister, Hinata, was a really cheerful person. She was the kind of person who you couldn't help but stare at, because she was so happy and kind and caring all the time. She never said a bad thing to anybody, and she always forgave everyone, no matter what. She was seven years older than me, so she took care of me all the time and was my best friend, too. I really admired her – more than anybody else in the world – and I wanted to be just like her."

She swallowed.

"And one day in America, when I was thirteen, my father and I were home, and the doorbell rang. It was a police officer, who told us that my mother and sister had been killed in a drunk driving accident. After that, the entire community mourned. Even my classmates mourned, and they'd only seen her a few times, when she came to pick me up from school. My father was devastated too, of course, and so I foolishly thought that if I tried to be like Hinata, everything would become better.

"And it worked, for a while. I became happier, brighter, more caring – everything I'd always wanted to be. Instead of being sarcastic, I would just smile and say something nice. I reigned in any insults on the tip of my tongue and just smiled. I got used to it, eventually, and everyone else seemed happier, even my father. So when you guys – not really you, Rei, but the rest of you – first met me at the beginning of the year, that's who I was. I was trying to be my sister.

"A while ago, I told Haruka my story, and he convinced me to stop trying to be someone else – _'What are you afraid of?'_ he asked me – and I guess I realized that he was right. No matter how hard I try, no matter how well I conceal my true self... well, I'm just a copy of my sister. And my sister wouldn't want that, and my dad wouldn't, either. I was just so focused on becoming _better_ that I didn't ever think about it."

She was teary-eyed again, but she gave Haruka a genuine smile – so genuine, that he almost felt like his heart was melting.

"So I'm really grateful that you guys are still my friends even when I'm _me_ – and I'm really grateful that Haruka snapped me out of it. It took me a few weeks, but... well, I'm pretty much _me_ now."

Nagisa clapped his hands excitedly and launched himself at Hikaru, who fell backward under his weight. "Hikaru-chan, we love you no matter what!"

That started a chain reaction, and Hikaru found herself lying on the ground, the others all hugging various parts of her and of each other, in a big pile. Somewhere, somehow, she caught Haruka's eye, and he smiled.

The rain had stopped. Makoto smiled, pointing. "Let's go outside, and I'll tell you why I'm afraid of the ocean."

"Eh? Mako-chan, you're afraid of the ocean?"

"Oh yeah, Rin told me something about that..."

"Rin?!"

"Rin-chan?"

"You've seen Rin?"

"Accidentally. When I went to buy the spices."

"He told you about me?"

"Not really... he was just surprised that you had agreed to the training camp. So, you gonna tell us why or what? I mean, I just spilled out my heart to you guys!"

"We have to go outside first! Look at the stars – "

"Makoto, tell me!"

"Hikaru, you're heavy – get off – "

She was sitting a bit higher than the rest of them the next morning, awake, watching them sleep peacefully. It definitely wasn't creepy – they were her friends, and she'd just woken up, too! She was hungry, and wondered if there was anything to eat other than mackerel and pizza.

"What are they doing?" she heard someone mutter, and turned to see a familiar redhead frowning in the boys' direction.

"Oh, Rin!"

Rin turned, surprised, before settling into a frown. "You again. What are you doing here?"

"I just woke up," she said, gesturing to where the others lay in the sand. "We basically almost died in the ocean last night, spent a while on a deserted island, and then swam back when the sun came up. So we're all pretty much dead. I'm hungry, so I decided to try to find something to eat."

Rin stared at her for a moment. "Makoto was okay with it?"

"Well, sort of," she said, shrugging. "We all shared secrets last night, too, so that was fun. Anyway, where are you going? Can I come?"

Rin scowled at her. "I'm running, obviously, and no. Go get breakfast or whatever. And don't tell them I was here."

Hikaru smirked. "Haruka!" she called. "Makoto! Nagisa! Rin's here!"

"Be quiet!" Rin snarled, hitting her shoulder and then dragging her away, down the path. "I just told you not to – "

"Well, Hinata might've heeded your request, but I'm not Hinata." The words felt good coming out of her mouth. Rin blinked a few times in confusion before shrugging, shaking his head, and saying,

"Whatever. Go get your food, already, and get away from me."

"Bye, Rin! Nice seeing you again!"

She thought she heard him mutter "go to hell" and burst out in giggles as she approached the convenience store. She bought a few boiled eggs and _onigiri_ , before heading back down to the tents.

Haruka was standing slightly to the side of one tent, looking around. She approached him as he continued to scan the surrounding area. "Haruka, what are you looking for?"

He spun around, his blue eyes fixating on her. He sighed. "You," he said, surprising Hikaru, and all of a sudden, her heart was beating faster. He gestured to the items in her arms and said, "I'll have mackerel, but the others will be glad to see that."

Hikaru laughed. "I know," she said. "Let's go grill your mackerel, then."

They headed to the picnic area together, where there was a small outdoor grill. Haruka lit a fire in it, pulled out a small pan, and set it on the grate. Hikaru sat on the bench, munching on an _onigiri_ , watching him as he went to get a piece of mackerel and laid it on the pan.

She wasn't sure why she was so fixated on him, but she just was. Haruka intrigued her. He was a man of few words, for sure, but he was so simple that he was complicated – so complicated that he was simple. He loved the water. He cared deeply for his friends. Sometimes he showed it in a weird way, though, but Hikaru didn't mind. He let her talk, too.

Sometimes, she closed her eyes and remembered the feel of his arms around her as she cried. And then she immediately tried to cast the thought out of her head, feeling her cheeks grow hot. It was _just_ as friends, she'd tell herself, over and over again.

She wasn't an idiot, though. Liking Haruka wasn't a foreign concept to her; it was actually absolutely, completely a possibility. That didn't mean she _liked_ it, necessarily.

But maybe she liked _him_.

Okay, this was getting out of hand. She shook her head clear of her thoughts, only to open her eyes to see Haruka staring at her. "What?"

"What are you doing?" he asked, and she just smiled and shrugged.

"Trying to wake myself up, I guess."

He looked at her for a moment more before turning back to his mackerel. She was sleepy, and sort of stared in his direction, her eyes unfocused, not really thinking about anything in particular. It wasn't until he sat down across from her and waved his hand in her face that she blinked, coming back to reality.

"Sorry, I'm tired," she said, yawning, before laying her head down on her arms. "Wake me up later."

Really? Haruka stared at her in disbelief. Was she really going to sleep _here_? "Go back to the tent and sleep," he said, but there was no response. "Hikaru."

There was still no response, so he gave up and began to eat his breakfast. It was nearing noon, actually, and in the distance, he saw Kou and Amakata-sensei heading their way. They didn't see him, though, and headed down to the beach, where their tents were still standing.

He couldn't help but turn to look at Hikaru again. She really did look like she was sleeping, and she was beautiful.

Like the water, he thought hastily.

He didn't think about much, but did imagine what it would look like, a few meters below the ocean, staring up at the shining, glittering surface. A shining, glittering blue... like Hikaru.

 _No!_ He quickly cast the thought out of his head. It wasn't _his_ fault Hikaru had blue eyes. It wasn't _his_ fault that Hikaru glittered. Sort of. But even so, he felt like he shouldn't think about such things. It was embarrassing, anyway, even though Makoto would surely humor him if he ever found out.

"Good morning, Haruka-senpai," came a female voice from beside him. Haruka pulled himself out of his thoughts and turned to face Kou, nodding to her in response. "Wait, is Hikaru asleep?"

"Apparently." He went back to his meal, savoring – as always – the taste of mackerel and pineapple together. Nobody would ever understand his "strange" food choices, but, well, they were the ones missing out.

Kou and Amakata-sensei sat down on the bench to his left, a respectable distance away, but not too far. Haruka wasn't bothered by them and continued eating, refusing to look at the blue-haired girl across from him.

"So why are they all lying on the beach?" asked Kou, finally, and Haruka swallowed a mouthful before explaining,

"We got cast into the ocean last night during the storm and spent the night on a deserted island."

There was a moment of stunned silence. "Oh."

"Are you all okay?" fretted Amakata-sensei, but Haruka just nodded in response, and their fears were quelled. Well, he thought, they were all _physically_ okay. As for mentally, he hoped that they – two of them in particular, and maybe three – had gotten over their limiting strain of thinking.

"We already had breakfast at the lodge," said Kou, "so maybe we should go wake them up. And who bought this _onigiri_? And the eggs?"

Haruka gestured toward Hikaru, still refusing to look at her. Kou nodded in understanding.

"And of course, you went for the mackerel anyway."

Haruka gave her a look that silently said, _"Of course."_ Kou stifled a giggle and turned away, before she motioned toward Amakata-sensei, who nodded in agreement. The two of them stood up, said a brief "see you later" to Haruka, and headed off in the direction of the others.

Hikaru let out a strange sound – a mix between a yawn and a groan. "Gimme some of that," she demanded sleepily, reaching out a hand toward him, and it took him a brief moment to realize she was going for his food.

"Get your own," he said, moving his plate away from her, and her hand fell back onto the wooden table in defeat. "You already ate."

"I want more."

"Get your own," he repeated, before gobbling up the rest of the food before she could somehow steal it from him. She sighed and raised her head off her arms, as Kou and Amakata-sensei came back, the boys in tow.

"Good morning, Haru," said Makoto, smiling as usual. "Good morning, Hikaru."

" _G'morning_ ," Hikaru mumbled in English, still blinking a bit sleepily.

"Hey, look! Eggs! Hikaru-chan, did you get this? Can I have one?" Nagisa was, as usual, overexcited, even in the morning after only a few hours of sleep.

"Uh-huh," said Hikaru, wiping at her eyes before blinking several times and opening them wide. She looked around, seeming to process the situation, her eyes meeting Haruka's briefly before he forced his gaze away.

"You're the best, Hikaru-chan!" cheered Nagisa. "Look, Rei-chan! Eggs and _onigiri_!"

"I can see that," Rei sniffed, grabbing one of each.

"I bought an egg and _onigiri_ for each of you," said Hikaru, stretching. Haruka could see it out of the corner of his eye. "You're welcome."

"Thanks, Hikaru," said Makoto, smiling at her, and she smiled back. Haruka briefly wondered what she would do if he smiled at her, ever, before realizing what he was thinking and quelling the thought.

The day was spent in the ocean once again, although they were all extremely glad it was now calm and serene, the sun batting down on them, the sound of Hikaru and Nagisa laughing echoing through everyone's minds, leaving a permanent impression, the way Rei tried his very hardest to keep up with them with his kickboard and how Haruka dropped back to help him with his technique, the silent admiration as Hikaru somehow attracted the attention of several guys down the beach, and the slight protectiveness that came with it.

In short, it was a good, productive day.

They all gathered around for dinner, Hikaru (surprisingly) downing three slices of pizza before Haruka nudged her and pointed to the mackerel. "Or you'll die," he said simply, and she shrugged before happily eating half a piece, leaving the other half untouched (which ended up in Haruka's possession, of course). Nagisa was uncontrollable, though; he ate pizza and pizza and resisted the mackerel, saying he'd eat it tomorrow. Makoto laughed.

They settled in for the night, everyone's limbs aching as they ducked into their respective tents. Hikaru, who rather liked the sleeping bag, bundled into it immediately. When Haruka entered the tent, bending low and ending up on his knees, she said, "This is pretty fun, isn't it?"

She'd been getting the feeling that he was avoiding her gaze, and it was pretty much confirmed when he looked away and said, "Yes."

She frowned. Despite what he'd said yesterday, perhaps he was still angry or mad at her for something – either for letting Makoto go (unlikely), or for blaming herself for letting him go (more likely). Either way, she didn't like having people – especially a friend like Haruka – mad at her.

"Haruka."

Her tone somehow compelled Haruka to turn and look at her, despite how hard he'd been trying not to. She just attracted too much attention – too much of _his_ attention – for his liking. But now, she gazed at him with big blue eyes that shone even in the darkness, her expression a bit melancholy, and he wondered if something was wrong.

"Are you mad at me still?"

He blinked. Well, he hadn't meant to give off _that_ impression... "No."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm not mad."

"Then why have you been ignoring me?"

So she'd noticed. He'd been tactless – he hadn't considered this outcome. He sighed, getting into his own sleeping bag, but turned to face her. "I'm not."

"You are!"

"I'm not." He thought about it, and couldn't resist adding, "Well, not _really_."

"So you are!" Hikaru whined, rolling over and over in her sleeping bag until she was right next to him, glaring at him. "Tell me why you're ignoring me."

He almost wished she was "Hinata" again, so that she wouldn't push him about it when he didn't even know the answer himself, but immediately felt bad for wishing it. She was Hikaru, and she would always be Hikaru – _not Hinata._ Besides, he liked Hikaru better; she was spunkier and happier.

"Ha-ru-ka," Hikaru drawled out, like the first time they'd met, "what's wrong?"

"It's nothing," he said dismissively. "Good night."

She pounded on his back, but he refused to open his eyes and lay still until she finally gave up. He lay there, listening as her breathing slowly evened out. He wondered if his strange thoughts were normal. Maybe Makoto had them, too.

He opened his eyes and rolled to his right, and gave a start when he saw Hikaru's face so close to his. Well, he hadn't expected that. Putting a respectable distance between them again, he decided against asking Makoto. It wasn't necessary, anyway, and Haruka wasn't one to embarrass himself.

As he drifted off to sleep, Makoto's voice whispered, _"What are you afraid of?"_


End file.
